He is finally here...

... healthy, big and just like his name suggest, he is gonna be "like lion", strong.

Welcome to our world, Leonitus!

It's the FINAL COUNTDOWN!

I have just returned from my final check-up with my gynae. It is now less than 48 hours before the birth of Leonitus!

Guess what I am most fearful of?

Not the epidural, not even the surgery. It is the dreadful confinement period; those hellish 28 days that top my list! >_<''

Probably because I am not a believer of confinement, I feel that those 28 days of "cannot do this, cannot do that" and having people to watch over your every moves and to constantly repeat "go and rest" like a broken down recorder, is simply torturous for me. I hate restrictions. For me, it felt almost like I am serving time in jail for giving birth. How nice!!!

I can't help but scoff whenever when I was told, if you don't this or that, you will suffer in the future. I am like... WTF!? From the moment I conceived, I am prepared to SUFFER for my children anyhow. Tell me which mother don't suffer for their kids?

I was told by some successful breastfeeding moms that my low milk production, the last round had something to do with my self-inflicted stress during confinement. I remembered, I wasn't eating well because I hated the confinement food so much that daily meals became so much of a chore than an enjoyment for me. And I had a bad pork kidneys scare that put me off the dish for the longest time ever, even though I used to like eating them before my confinement.

This time round, with all the past experiences and lessons learnt, I wish I would have more control over my life during this dreaded period and also hopefully I can breastfeed more successful too.

And to all those confinement advocates out there, I thank you for your kindness and concern, please save it for the next person. Don't worry about me, if those 'ang mohs' mothers who didn't have confinements didn't die, I would also turn out just fine too.

If I ever needed a "last goodbye"

It's six more days to the birth of precious Leonitus, I am all filled with anticipations and apprehensions. This time, I have opted for elective C-section because the size of my pelvis makes natural birth quite a challenge for me.

As with all labors, the risks of C-sections are comparably higher, and there is a greater possibility of complications which can result in fatality. I am not taking any chances to leave without saying proper goodbyes.

Life can be unpredictable. You can label me morbid or crazy or both, I wouldn't want to be caught in a situation where I have to leave without a last word. Previously, I had wrote an entry dedicated to Laetitia, now I think I want to leave something for Mr Hubby.

Here goes...

"Dear, I can't thank you enough for loving and marrying me, you have given me the best time of my life. We might not have been the type of couple who talk very much to each other, but I know and trust that everything you have done are for the good, if not the best, for me and our family.

Every time I watched you and Laetitia together, I feel so blessed to have you as a father for our children. I know you will continue to be a great Dad for Leonitus and teach him to grow up just like you, righteous and caring. You possesses amazing strengthens and your perseverance would become a good example for our children. Spend as much time as you can with them, for they grow up in such a hurry and I know you know that very well too.

I love you and our kids... nothing in the world would change this. Do what's best for you and them."

********************

Of course, I would be OK. Writing this entry is like buying an insurance; I am sure nobody wants to die when they buy insurance right. So, chill!

Counting Down

It’s has been seven days after the hype of welcoming a brand new year. I am kind of still in a holiday mode as there hasn’t been much for me to do at work because I am going on maternity leave soon.

HURRAY!! HURRAY!!

I know I said it many times, but I still want to shout it out loud, “I can’t wait to POP!”

The baby is getting so big that it almost felt like I have a melon sitting on my vagina all the time! It aches so badly when I walk and I can never find a comfortable position for sitting or sleeping. If I remember correctly, having Laetitia was not that difficult, maybe age is really catching up on me.

To make matter worst, I am feeling nauseous constantly. I think it is because my stomach is being compressed upwards and the acid in it refluxes back, making me feel like shit!

However, I know everything would be worth it when I see my new born king. All I want now is for him to be healthy and may the delivery be smooth … smooth like tofu! Hehehe…