Seeing it from a peculiar perspective?!

The Internet Never Forgets

2012-02-07T23:53:00.000+08:00

Dug this picture out from the internet when I tried to google for "SK-II". It was me, working, when I was 8 months pregnant with Leonitus. I was looking like a fucking WHALE!!

Is there really no way to remove this hideous photo of me from the world wide web?!

The Terrible 2s

2012-01-30T22:32:00.003+08:00

My son just turned two, a couple of weeks back.

First, let me tell you a time when he was just a baby; he was simply godsend!

Leonitus was the type of baby that everyone would love to have. He was always smiling, very easy-going and very calm. I could just leave him on a play mat and he would play on his own and then fell asleep on the mat when he was tired. When he woke up, he would simply continue to entertain himself on the play-mat. He would drop off to sleep in the evening on his own, no need endless rocking (btw, I had never allow "sarong" in my home). By midnight, I would give him his last feed by sticking the bottle into his mouth while he was still very much asleep and he would finish off his milk without waking up! Don't have to burp him or change his diaper, he would just sleep throughout the night and then wakes up next morning cheery. Having such a baby was even better than winning 4D!

Two years later... what happen now?

I have got this screaming toddler who bounce himself off the bed, the table, the sofa and almost everywhere! He either crawls under the clothes racks or ran off in the opposite direction when I tried to shop. He checks out every electrical appliances whenever he could lay his hands upon. He howls louder than 10 wolves combined when I dish out punishment.

He is now making us pay for being the perfect baby he was - with interests, lots and lots of interests!! God, when is this going to end....

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

Seduced by nature

2012-01-14T22:52:00.005+08:00

We passed by this lonely stretch of road along Mandai every weekday, driving to our offices. There is the unusual serenity of the Upper Seletar Reservoir that never fail to captivate us.

Earlier this evening, we were on our way home after dinner, we had to surrender ourselves and be seduced by the beauty of the setting sun against the horizon of the reservoir. Mr Hubby stopped the car and we got everybody out.

We watched strangers fishing by the banks and admired the colors of dusk reflected in the water. It is an epiphany to have this moment with nature.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.2

My 2012 'Obiang' Count-Down Party

2012-01-01T22:53:00.003+08:00

On the last night of 2011, my Mr Hubby organized one of the best count-down party at our place. The theme of the party was 'Obiang' (a Singlish word which describes people who are grossly out of fashion), and all the invited guests (except for one who received special immunity) were expected to come dressed to the theme. We even had best dressed awards and worst dressed penalties for this.

So here we were looking like fools. I couldn't stop laughing at Mr Hubby's outfit. Whatever happened to my handsome husband!! Wahahahaha....

The guests were divided into 3 teams to play and score points in 3 different games prepared for the night. My team was called 'Orbit' and the other two team were 'Fat-tas-tic' and 'Ku Ku Jiao'.

The first game was Uno Stacko. With my steadiness, this game was an absolutely breeze for me and my team.

The second game was Twister, which got everyone twisted up and we had a good time laughing our heads off seeing, each other struggled to be on the mat.

The last game into the night was the most exciting, called 'Fill to the Brim', where we needed to take turns to drop coins into glasses of beverages. There were red wine, beer, JD Coke, JD shot and a big glass of plain water. Any teams that spill the drink while dropping their coin, must then bottom up; never mind that the drink was already disgustingly polluted by the coins deposited inside.

Everybody kind of hold their breathe whenever someone was attempting to cut the coin into the brim-filled glass of beverage.

Intense concentration and steady fingers were the key to this game. Our team lost 2 out of 5 drinks and I had to down the beer which tasted really quite yucky!

The team with the best combined score walked home with a prize - food vouchers worth $120. And team Fat-tas-tic won!

We also sponsored a lucky draw prize of a branded Microwave Oven for Bingo, however I was too lucky and won it back. Eventually, we are still stuck with a brand new Microwave Oven which we wanted to clear from our storage. Anyone wants to buy from us? Guarantee, sell cheap.

Best dressed male and female also each walked away with the $30 food voucher. Look at how seriously 'Obiang' this pair of husband and wife was! They purposely went to Mustafa to buy these outfits; they definitely deserved to win!

It was a great start to my New Year. I hope you enjoyed yours too! Happy 2012!

The night before the eve of New Year

2011-12-30T23:48:00.002+08:00

2011 is a good year for me. In short, I lost some weight, got a better silhouette, went on several short trips with my family, intercepted a disease and prevented cancer, started running (something that I never dreamed I could do), deciphered my children's allergies and finally seeing some good progress with their health.

In 2012, my resolution is SIMPLE. I want to complete a 10 km run and study a course to enrich myself.

Meanwhile, here is some post-Christmas pictures, showing off our presents.

I bought Mr Hubby a Hugo Boss tie; I didn't know how to select a tie, so I bought him one in my favorite color - purple.

And my dearest Mr Hubby bought me a LV shawl in, you guess it right, my favorite color - purple.

Happy New Year, in advance!

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.2

Gluten-Free Baking

2011-12-23T21:58:00.003+08:00

Some months back, we found ourselves thrown into the world of gluten-free when our two kids were found to have food intolerance (which explained why they were always wheezing and coughing). They were reactive to gluten and dairies, which simply meant that they have to kiss goodbye to cakes, biscuits, cookies, pastries, pizzas, ice-creams, muffins, breads and so much more.

It's so hard to be different, especially when food intolerance is still kind of an alien to many Asian parents. Many people do not understand why we freaked out when someone insisted that a tiny piece of cake is OK for our kids. It's also very heart wrenching to have our kids watched as other normal children gulped down all those wonderful and sinful goodies made from wheat flour, while they can't touch any of those.

So I decided I don't want to deny my children of their childhood, and no, I am not going to cave in and start 'poisoning' them with commercially-baked products. I am going to be my children's personal baker.

One of the first recipe I tried was Banana and Walnut Muffins from Joy of Baking. I simply substitute the flour and baking powder with gluten-free self-raising flour, and for melted butter, I used rice bran oil in its place. The result was unexpectedly delicious. I went on experiment with blueberries and had such a huge success that boosted my confidence to bake more.

Bite-sized blueberries muffins I made for my kids' school's potluck.

Recently, I found this Betty Crocker's Gluten-Free Cake Mix at Fair Price Finest. I was over the moon! I tried its Devil's Food and was surprised at how much it tasted just like normal cake, if not better, even though I had to swop butter for Planta.

There's more to life than being intolerance towards gluten and dairies and I am loving gluten-free baking!

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.1

We Survived the 5 Days Langkawi Trip

2011-12-18T14:00:00.001+08:00

The morning of our trip, my son, Leonitus woke up to a bad cough. I crossed my fingers hard but still I couldn't prevent him from falling sick. So we left on that Friday evening with him at the start of his cold and no helper, not even the kids' grandmother this time. We were all on our own.

I thought I heard Mr Hubby praying for God's mercy...

The kids were well rested and we woke up to a beautiful morning. Leonitus's nose started dripping but he was still good to enjoy the rest of the day.

We were staying in Sunset Beach Resort which was just a stone thrown from the Underworld Water.

The kids liked the penguins feeding but overall this is a place to be missed with you have been to Singapore's Sentosa Underwater World. There is really nothing much here.

We rented a car in the afternoon and drove to Jetty Point. Again this is another place to miss if you do not spend as many days in Langkawi as we do. It is basically a duty-free shopping mall but seriously there was nothing I wanted to buy here.

The next morning, we drove to Wildlife Park; it is place that would only appeal to young children who like lots of birds and animals. The good thing about the place is that you can buy food to feed the animals.

It's really good to rent a car, so we can explore the area on our own without time pressure. Mr Hubby drove past this stretch of beach which was very much forsaken. He stopped the car and brought Laetitia along to take some pictures.

The kids were dying to go to the beach, so we took them to the one next to our resort.

As it was raining earlier, the water was so damn cold, I didn't dare to swim in it, so I just sat on the beach and dug my feet into the mud-like sand.

Look at him. Who can be angry with those innocent 'Puss in Boots' pair of eyes?

Dinner time. I really hate that because Leonitus had been so fussy with food ever since he reached Langkawi with a bad cold. He hardly ate anything except for fries, sweet corns kernels and the gluten-free cookies that I had brought along. He really drove me crazy at mealtimes.

Mangrove Boat Tour at Kilim Geopark was the best and the worst part of our trip. Best, because we truly enjoyed ourselves very much. It was educational and fun for the whole family. We visited a bat cave, a fish farm, our boat went through a limestone cave, we saw sea eagles feeding within meters from us. Pure awesomeness!

The worst, because Leonitus lost one of his shoes just before we board the boat and that was his one and only pair of shoes we brought to Langkawi. He was to go bare-footed throughout the trip or I would have to break my back and carry him until we can find a place to buy him a pair of new shoes. I chose the latter.

The last day of our trip, we finally made it to the Langkawi Cable Car. It was our 4th attempt because the bad weather conditions had prevented the cable car from operation the last three times we were there. Look how glad we were.

The most tiring part of the Cable Car trip was to carry Leonitus and walked down a long flight of stairs from the cable car station to the suspension bridge and then climbed back up again. Luckily, I had started running if not I think my legs would break!

This trip wouldn't be possible if not for my dearest husband, who is the super dad to our children.

One last picture from the viewing point of the cable car station which was 700 m above sea-level before we head back down to the ground.

We had lunch at a totally empty Japanese restaurant. We only knew why when we were placing our order. They ran out of sashimi, fish roes for the sushi and practically anything that spell Japanese!

But guess who threw the wildest tantrum over lunch? Leonitus, and he wasn't even the one eating!

We had a complimentary night at Sheraton Langkawi. The kids loved the swimming pool while I really love their bed!

We were lucky to be given a late check-out at 4pm but our flight was not until 8.40pm, so we just let the kids treat the hotel lobby as our second home.

Before we board the plane home, Leonitus gave us a grand finale and threw up all over himself; I had to rush to buy him a new top because all the clothes had been checked in together with the luggage. Finally, we touched down at Singapore Changi airport just when Leonitus's mucus had turn into an eerie green color.

There is something about travelling with kids. You love it and hate it at the same time, but almost always, you would want to do it again. That's parenthood! More photos here.

Simple Joy Is...

2011-12-15T22:56:00.001+08:00

Revisiting the place where we had our very first date and reliving the feeling of falling in love.

Having a new hamster, named Quinny Peace (by my 4 YO), who is bold enough to take its feed from my fingers. It is so unlike our previous dwarf hamsters who shunned me like plague.

Baking wonderfully delicious gluten-free and dairy-free banana walnut muffins for my two special kids and seeing them wolfed down those muffins was pure happiness. You won't understand unless you also have kids who suffer from food intolerance.

Seeing how much my little cuties enjoy school. I am so fortunate; those mothers who have to drag their screaming and kicking kids pass those school gates must really envy me to death.

Running. From almost dying after running 800 meters during Cold Storage Kids Run in May this year, to now, completing almost 8 kilometer and still feeling really good. I am amazed by my own level of endurance. *smirk*

Immersing myself with a really good drama, which had me crying and laughing and then crying and laughing all over again.

Such are the simple joys of my life! So what makes you smile today?

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.1

She turns four

2011-12-07T17:59:00.004+08:00

Yesterday was my daughter, Laetitia's 4th birthday. I almost didn't believe I actually had her for four years already. It sure feels as though I had just brought her home from the hospital not too long ago.

From the foetus that I would often see in the ultrasound scanning to the first time I saw her, out of my womb, looking like a toy doll covered in creams and ketchup, till now, looking more and more like a mini lady; I am so blessed to have her.

Happy birthday, my angel.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.1

Going Beyond "I Do"

2011-11-17T00:42:00.004+08:00

I like attending weddings; it has a magical effect on me. Seeing the brides walking down the aisle in lacy white gowns, I almost wanted to believe in those fairytale’s happily-ever-after crap.

Every time, I read Snow White or Cinderella or Rapunzel to my young daughter, I would roll my eyes when I reached the end of the story. “… the Prince married the princess and they lived happily ever after.”

Can you believe the kind of poison that was seeded into our young minds when we were children and later bloomed into the most unrealistic expectation we have on marriage? We were made to believe that marriage is the only key to end our miserable lives but on the contrary, marriage can be the beginning of nightmares for some women.

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against holy matrimony. In fact, I am a believer of it. But women (even some men) must be clear that happily-ever-after does not come automatically after saying “I do”.

It would takes many ‘ingredients’ (love alone is never enough) like commitment, faith, courage, loyalty, understanding, care, concern and throw in some pragmatic elements like financial stability, status/economic compatibility and even some tears must be shed, to concoct marital bliss.

So unless you are living with seven dwarfs, have a fairy godmother and your hair is ten miles long, you have better start putting in efforts to create your own happily-ever-after.

And as for me, I didn’t have a lavish wedding, just a warm and humble reception surrounded by people who loves me. It has been four years and two kids, with fair amount of ups and downs, and I am still feeling happy.

How we do it? Simple but fun stuff, like sneaking out to catch a show when the kids have fallen asleep (with another caregiver at home), exploring new places for dinner, just the two of us so it feels like we are still in courtship. Doesn't even have to be often, just once a month or two. Have a hobby or do something that you both enjoy. For us, we run. And it is never too late to start; I only started exercising with Mr Hubby two months ago!

Lastly, never expect your spouse to change for you, instead, have your own life and do everything a woman possibly can to look good. Because a happy wife = a happy marriage. That gives me all the more reason to buy more new shoes and dresses! How can I not be happy!?

It's good to have 2

2011-11-03T22:59:00.001+08:00

I never wanted to have a second baby after Laetitia, because I am not too into kids but I do love my own very much.

Plus, I was afraid that having two children would mean lots more chaos at home, which turned out that I am right. My home always looks like a battlefield, with ~~dead soldiers~~ toys and books littered all over the place every evening!

And did I forget to mention the constant squabbles and fights, which actually aren't as bad as having them both down with flu or any nasty viruses of sort. I have already forgotten how it feels like to have a day goes by without hearing someone cry.

If I can start all over again, would I still choose to have two?

You bet, I will.

Why?

Because of this:

The love they have for each other. Priceless

Go Green

2011-11-01T18:51:00.001+08:00

I am not the greenest person by nature. I try to refuse a plastic bag if I really don't need one but I don't bring along a recyclable bag to my grocery shopping. I would drop my can into the recycle bin whenever I consume Coke Zero from my office but I threw away countless numbers of Coke Zero's PET bottles down the chute when I am at home. I tried to remember to switch off lights whenever I am not in the area but I need my air-con every night. Yes, even rainy nights.

Probably some iceberg in the Antarctic is melting away because of me; I do feel a tinge of guilt from time to time.

So last Sunday, we (Mr Hubby suggested and I just went along) left our two cars parked at home and took the kids with us on public transport. There is always first time for everything.

We travelled by train to Holland Village for dinner. The kids were over the moon because don't all kids have a strange obsession with trains?! But the best part wasn't until we made our way home.

Laetitia, our nearly 4 year old, had been begging us to take her on a double-decker bus ride like forever. So we decided to take a slight detour by taking Bus #7 from Holland Village to Clementi and then continue our journey home from there, taking the train.

She was ecstatic. The other passengers on the bus must be thinking we were some alien from outer space, for we were taking pictures of our kids like nobody's business while they were going "Woww!! Look! Mommy! Whoooaa!"

We made it home safely. And surprisingly, it had been an enjoyable trip, not just for the kids but we love just as much too.

Do your part. Go Green whenever possible.

Suddenly Friday

2011-10-21T23:30:00.004+08:00

Had a really busy week; training 4 full days in a roll and before I know it, it's FRIDAY!! WOOHOO!!

This past week, every netizens seemed to be talking about the horrible video where a toddler was ran over by 2 vehicles and was ignored by 18 morons who treated her as though she was some injured strays. I am no evil person but I do wish to see that they hang the first driver because he is every bit of a sociopath and he shouldn't deserve to be living among humans. Read about his dialogue with a reporter here. I am sure you will feel disgusted by his lack of morality.

The little girl is finally free from all her pains and sufferings and moved on to a better place, even though I don't believe in heaven, I think this is still better for her.

Myself, I had a crappy evening (T_T) But I felt so much more at peace with myself now after power-walking continuously for 90mins.

Since, the weekend is round the corner, maybe life shouldn't be all so dark and sinister after all. Here are some of my mobile randomness that reminds me that the world can still be a wonderful place sometimes...

I made gluten-free bread for my two kids who suffer from food intolerance. Not delicious, but I made with it with love.

Stopping at the traffic lights, I looked over my shoulders and saw this funny sight - Laetitia completely
'concussed'.

Love my new trainers. Love the quirky color combo of my workout gears!

Finally, the serenity of a sleeping child. I should feel so blessed. So blessed.
.
.
.

Nothing to be Afraid of

2011-10-14T20:56:00.031+08:00

10th Oct (I know I am late) was World Mental Health Day, a day to raise public awareness for the mentally ill. I know most of you would be shunning, "Oh, I don't want to have anything to do with the crazies!"

And this is exact the reason why I have chose to blog about it. There is an absolute need to debunk the myth of mental illness. Blogging about my own struggle with Borderline Personality Disorder would make me vulnerable; in this stigmatising society which we live in, I might lose some friends or perhaps even my job when this entry goes live. But I want to do something, I want to give back to the society, I want to put a face to it, to show everyone out there that being diagnosed with a mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of. It is a sickness, not a sin. And we can go on to become well and lead dignified and fulfilling lives.

This was me, 5 years ago. Having battled depression for more than half a decade, I was finally diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder at the age of 30.

And what was I like then?

I looked fabulous and could have impressed people easily, but behind closed door, I don’t even know who I really was. I was confused with my own identity.

I wasn't like those mad people you watch on the TV, locked up in an asylum. But I indeed stayed in a psychiatric ward in a hospital for a short time - 14 days to be precise.

I had poorly regulated emotions, which was why I would be nice on some days and screamed at the same person, the next.

Occasionally, I would have intense anxiety for no apparent reason, which made me retreated into my own solitary.

I was aloof because we didn't want to get unnecessary involvement, coz I felt it would always be me who get hurt in the end. I was superficial because the intensity of human relations drove me to my pits and I believed being indifferent will help me keep that facade.

I had chronic feelings of emptiness, that was why I jumped from people to people to fill the void, but I feared being connected emotionally at the same time. I fell for people easily and fell out of it, just as quickly too. I had abnormal fear of attachment, as I thought of attachment as future abandonment.

I was impulsive and self-damaging, I tried killing myself a few times. And I actually enjoyed self-mutilation because I believed the physical pain would lessen my emotional turmoil.

I used to be paranoid and depressive, I felt the world was an evil place. I didn't know how to take things lightly because my life was a matter of black and white, I didn't know how to accept the multiple shades of grey.

I hated everything, I blamed everyone, including myself, I wanted to be dead.

That was me.
.
.
.

Now, I have come a long way.

I am successful (in my own opinion), drug and therapy-free and loving each and every day of my life. And I want you to know, with early interventions, there is nothing to be afraid for being a little mad some times.

Gain Some, Lose Some

2011-10-10T23:17:00.001+08:00

I hadn't been blogging much lately because I am really busy. Busy jogging in the gym or around my estate. I am persistent to lose those pounds! Haha..

Anyway, last week, I received my third phone call from head-hunting company for a position as the Regional Trainer in a competition's company. Like the other two calls I received earlier, I rejected the person.

I know I am limiting my own career path by choosing to stay local. But between a globetrotting high-flyer and a mother, I choose to be the mom who will always come home for my little ones. And I know, I am happy with my choice. No regrets.

You gain some, you lose some. Not a big deal.

Becoming Gym Rats

2011-09-30T14:18:00.003+08:00

For the last couple of months, Mr Hubby has suddenly transformed himself into a fitness fanatic. He would hit the gym or the pool almost every evening. And he seems to have become quite narcissistic too. I watched as he sucks in his tummy and admires his own reflection in the mirror.

Hmmm.... So I had to ask him, "Why are you suddenly so into working out?"

"Because I want to attract younger and prettier women." came his reply.

Gosh!! So, is my marriage heading for trouble??!! Should I be depressed??

Guess what, instead of letting insecurity slowly murdering me and our marriage; I have decided to become Mr Hubby's fitness partner.

Few days back, we were chilling out by the pool after our gym session, Mr Hubby let me in to the real reason for starting to get active. He said he was mortified by the fact that many people around him (including myself) were struck by diseases and he didn't want to lead a sedentary lifestyle, wanting for diseases to manifest anymore. And he also wanted to be a role model for our children, encouraging them to grow up healthy and active.

OK. So my marriage is not doom after all. Perhaps, I should keep away my track shoes and go back to my ice-creams and telly. NOT.

The above picture was taken by Mr Hubby on my first day of fitness partnership, which he posted to his FB page with comment "New workout partner, hope she is not making guest appearance only..."

It has been 4 days, and I must admit, I am feeling GREAT!

My Son

2011-09-19T00:09:00.000+08:00

We didn't plan to have him. I was quite certain that I only wanted one child after my daughter, Laetitia, was born. I remembered myself crying when I realised I was pregnant again.

It was totally unexpected, I had loads of apprehension... but in the end, I was filled with immense amount of joy when he arrived safely into our world some nineteen months ago.

Ever since then, he is like an angel who brought us smiles and filled our lives with so much more than we had been prepared for.

Tonight, I looked at him sleeping soundly beside me and wonder what my life would be without him.

My son, you have no idea how thankful I am to have you. Sleep tight, please don't wake me up again tonight.. and I love you!

Unforgetable Phuket

2011-09-14T22:07:00.002+08:00

I had this Phuket trip planned as early as May, then many unfortunate things cropped up along the way. My mom had to have surgery to have her breast removed, I had my fair share of surgery recently too. But we were persistent and carried on with our plan to have this short but beautiful getaway.

I shall just let the pictures do the talking...

We were staying in this huge 2-bedroom pool villa at Marriott Vacation Club, Mai Khao beach.

The kids wasted no time to hit the pool.

My mom couldn't swim but she had a good time chilling by the pool.

Day 2 - We took the hotel buggy and headed for Mai Khao beach. It was refreshing to see a deserted beach in Phuket, a stark contrast to Phuket's other beach like Patong.

Because we were staying in Mai Khao, which was like miles away from the town area, we rented a car with GPS. It was a real good idea because the taxi here is practically day-light robbery!

We were heading to this place called Laem Hin Seafood for dinner. It's a floating restaurant with very nice view but lots of mosquitoes!

Day 3 - We drove the long winding road to Kata Viewpoint where we could see Kata beach and Karon beach.

Then we stopped by an elephant camp where we took a 30-minutes elephant rides into the woods which was a big hit with my two kids. They absolutely love it.

Day 4 - We checked out of Marriott Vacation Club and checked into JW Mariott nearby for a few hours because our flight was in the evening and the check-out time for MVC was 10 in the morning.

Then the kids and their Daddy went swimming again.

With this last picture of Leonitus, all wrapped up, our trip was also coming to an end. It was my first time in 35 years, travelling with my mom - it was unforgettable.

More pictures of the trip here.

Plastic and Makeups

2011-08-27T00:01:00.003+08:00

Take a look at the pictures below. Do you know who is this pretty lady?

If your answer is Dawn Yang, our local celebrity blogger, you are only correct by about 15%. Because the pictures above are actually 7 different girls (only the 4th photo is Dawn Yang). I was surfing this blog site called Daily Lenglui which features pretty gals and I found many of them all looking freakishly alike, as though they were dolls coming from the same factory or something.

Most of the 'leng lui' are rumoured to have plastic surgeries to look the way they look. Could they have all gone to the same plastic surgeons?!

On a different note, something else from the net amazes me.

This is Promise Phan, an Asian girl living in USA. And this is her on a normal day without makeup. Very ordinary-looking.

Now this is Promise Phan, with makeups. WOW!! I know.

She didn't have just one type of gorgeous look, she is versatile like a chameleon.

She can even transform herself into Disney's princesses. Here, you have her as Jasmine in Aladdin and Ariel, the mermaid.

Not just that, she can also make herself up to resemble superstars; save going under the knife. Check out her miraculous transformations! I was so blown away!

Promise Phan VS Angelina Jolie

Promise Phan VS Taylor Swift

Promise Phan VS Scarlett Johansson

Even Captain Jack Sparrow!

Before seeing what Promise can do with makeup, I was contemplating to have double eyelids surgery. I do have double eyelids already but they are flaring into multiple eyelids and also they are on the faint side. Anyway, now I am bloody inspired, I will learn to live with my natural eyelids and accentuate them with makeup instead.

Have a good super long weekend! No diff for me, I am still on MC.

Now Hiring

2011-08-21T22:11:00.000+08:00

I love my children, that's without a doubt. But having to deal with their leaky noses, ear-piercing screams, bumps, bruises and earth-shattering cries on a daily basis can zap up all of my energy, leaving me feeling awfully crappy. It's time like that when I would wish that I have a double.

So here I am, putting up an ad for this shitty job, so that I may take a breather.

Position available: Mommy to a preschooler & a toddler

Potential candidates need not have any prior experiences nor qualification.
All age and race are welcome. Smoker need not apply.

Job Requirements:

- Must possess a heart brave enough to tame the tigers and compassionate enough to spare an ant.
- Must have patience by the truckload
- Must be able to work round the clock; ability to multi-task is an absolute must.
- Must be physically fit (because this job does not permit you to be on MC)
- Must be able to plan ahead of time, better if you are good in forecasting
- Must possess abilities to teach, entertain, discipline and read a captivating bedtime story
- Must be familiar with Supernanny, Jo Frost's 'time-out'
- Must be able to administrate medicines, take temperature and dress up wounds (nursing background is an advantage)
- Must be able to plan and cook nutritious meals for the kids
- Must possess the skill of a hairdresser and the flair of a fashion stylist
- Must be able to pronounce A-Z phonically
- Must be familiar with the characters of Sesame Streets, Dora, Barney and every classic fairy tales
- Must be firm and gentle at all times
- Must be able to deal with stress, pressure, cries and tantrums
- Must be fair and unbiased
- Must love ~~monsters~~ children

Benefits: Almost none except for the occasional hugs & kisses and unlimited supplies of poo & pee.

Remuneration: Priceless! And believe me, I don't say it's priceless for nothing. You won't get a cent!

Any ~~lunatics~~ parties interested in the above position, please leave me a comment.
(Honestly, I do not believe anybody would respond.)

The Gift

2011-08-17T14:50:00.001+08:00

Have you ever got more than you bargain for? Like the time you paid for a moisturiser and got a brand new lipstick. In retail, they call it "free gift".

I went for my routine health screening in June this year and I didn't expect one, but I too received a "free gift".

No, it didn't come properly wrapped, neither did it spot a cute ribbon on it but anyhow, it had profoundly changed my life and I will tell you all about the incredible things it had done for me.

For a start, it had given me a 17 days vacation. I get paid without having to go to the office, it's more days than someone's annual leaves, all add up!

Suddenly, I am showered with love and care; and had calls, messages and emails flooding in from every corner of the world, even from friends or acquaintances whom I have not heard from in years! Next, I woke up to flowers; and fruit basket came knocking on my door.

I am given the legitimate reason to laze on my bed for as long as I wanted to, without anyone dare calling me a bum. Finally, I found time to do nothing but watch my kids sleep. It was luxurious!

I became so much more knowledgeable and gain enough medical vocabulary and jargons that I could easily be passed off as a medical personnel.

It had help me to recalibrate the priorities of my life and forced me to redefine my values and purpose for living. It's amazing! And I got it for free!

The catch is - it's non-returnable, non-exchangeable and also non-transferable. So what is the free gift?

It's Cervical Intraepithelial Neoplasia 2, better known as CIN-2 (precancerous stage of cervical cancer), with a detection of high risk HPV, the strain of HPV that causes almost all cervical cancer.

Picture taken from my colposcopy

I had LEEP to remove the dysplasia and is still awaiting my biopsy report. I am hopeful but vigilant. I know, this might just be the beginning and while I am doing fine now, I wouldn't wish for you to have this "gift".

I had my "gift" and there is no way for me to return it, I thought I might as well make the best out of it, by telling the world that Pap Smear had saved my life and it could save yours too.

And we can all kick Cervical Cancer's butt by choosing a non-promiscuous lifestyle and with a simple vaccine to prevent HPV (works even better if you are not sexually active yet) you would have lower your risk of Cervical Cancer by so much.

Cervical Cancer is currently one of the most common cancer affecting Singaporean women, but with some effortless commitment, we could all help change that. Log on now to Power Over Cervical Cancer because I am sure, like me, you wouldn't want to wait until you are given the much bigger "gift' - Cervical Cancer, itself.

Bread and Butter Pudding will save the day

2011-08-11T17:20:00.001+08:00

Yesterday morning, I received a telephone call from my gynaecologist; it was news that wasn't very pleasing. Although, I kept reassuring myself to stay positive; it still had me thinking.

If I die one day, would I have anything that I might want to pass on to my kids so that I can be remembered by. That afternoon, I showed Laetitia how to make a simple dish, using 'recycled' bread from our fridge. I know she would surely love my recipe for Bread and Butter Pudding. And I was right! Laetitia couldn't stop eating it.

Ingredients:

5-6 slices of bread (I used leftover corn bread, but any bread is fine)

2 cups of milk (I used the free samples baby's formula)

2 eggs (small to medium size)

Half cup of brown sugar (white sugar will do too)

A handful of raisins

1 tsp of vanilla essence

A pinch of salt

About 2 tbsp of butter for greasing the pan and buttering the bread.

Instructions:

1) Preheat oven at 175 degree and grease a 24cm x 20cm baking tin well with some butter.
2) Cut the bread up into quarter or smaller pieces and butter both sides of all pieces of bread.
3) Beat up the eggs lightly and pour in the milk, then whisk them up gently.
4) Pour in the sugar, vanilla essence and salt. Continue to whisk until the mixture is consistent.
5) Line the bread pieces up in the baking tin, sprinkle some raisins on top and pour in half of the mixture, passing through a sieve.
6) Lay a second layer of bread pieces, sprinkle the rest of the raisins and pour in the remaining of the mixture, passing through a sieve.

7) Press lightly on bread pieces to ensure that the mixture soaks through well.

8) Pop the baking tin into the oven and bake for 45-60 mins until you get a golden colored top.

9) You can pass through a fork in the middle and if it comes out clean the pudding is ready.
10) Set it to cool for a while before cutting.

***********************

Tomorrow, I would be having a surgery to remove the pre-cancerous cells found in my cervix. I know, many of you might be worried reading about this. But please chill, you would be helping me, by believing that I would do well.

If you are still feeling down for me, use my recipe and bake yourself some delicious Bread and Butter Pudding. Trust me, baking therapy does you good!

Wisdom that I wish I didn't have

2011-08-08T23:15:00.002+08:00

Some weeks back, I was experiencing a nagging pain in my tooth; a check with the dentist revealed more. I was having a wisdom tooth and it was impacted, that was why it was hidden out of my sight. It wasn't just that, the wisdom tooth was also pressing on my nerve causing this on and off pain.

An appointment was made for a dental surgeon to cut it out. And today is the day.

You have no idea how terrified I was. Since young, I have this morbid fear for dental procedures (even polishing scares the shit out of me) and this was made worst by the root canal from hell which I had a year ago.

The dental surgeon gave me some shots of local anesthetic then the rest became fuzzy. I think I was trying to create some kind of mental block so that I would not suffer any post-traumatic stress disorder from all those drilling and cracking and yanking.

I was later told that my wisdom tooth was not only humongous but it was also very deep (close to the nerve) hence the dental surgeon had to break it up before removing it.

I brought my "souvenir" home. When Laetitia came back from school, I show it to her. It was a good chance to talk to her about oral hygiene and my bloody tooth was a ~~good scare tactic~~ useful tool to get her to brush her teeth every night.

When I was done preaching and was about to dump my tooth in the trash, Laetitia suggested that I keep it under my pillow for the tooth fairy. I didn't want to keep the yucky remains of my tooth, let only sleep with it. So I made up an excuse that the tooth fairy wouldn't want my tooth.

Then Laetitia said cheekily, "Why? Is it because it's broken. Next time, be careful ok!"

I just nodded and smiled back.

Well, I am just glad it's over.

Negligence

2011-07-27T23:07:00.004+08:00

I have been neglecting my blog for quite a while. Besides the fact that I have a crazily busy month filled with trainings, workshops and what not, I am tired.

I am tired. Not the physical exhaustion type which one can recuperate from sleep or rest.

I am tired of looking at my calendar and planning my life around work and home and still worrying if the balance is ever right.

I am tired of freaking myself out necessarily whenever my kids cough at night, worrying if I have made the wrong decision to take them off inhalers and throw them into the embrace of TCM.

I am tired of putting up with the fact that my mother has terminal cancer and fooling myself that she is able to survive anything now and forever.

I am tired to know that I have about ten thousand things to do on my next off day and none of them can be considered pleasant. (I have to go to the Indo Embassy to ask about my helper's home leave, get Leonitus jab for Pneumococcal, visit my gynaecologist, do the grocery shopping, visit the dentist for my wisdom tooth and I don't even know how to fill them all in within just one day.)

I am tired of trying to convince myself that the abnormality of my Pap Smear result must be something totally not serious. It's been so fucking nerve-wreaking but I choose not to tell anyone, up until now.

I am tired of fearing death. Not that I am afraid to die but I shiver whenever I imagine my kids grow up without a mother.

I am tired for knowing that I can do a million things that were right and all I need is to make just one mistake and judgement would rain on me all the same.

I am tired for I am unable to cry out loud to relieve myself because I refuse to be weak.

I am tired of neglecting myself for what seems like a very long time.

And I am sorry if I brought your mood down with this post but you know what? I am just too tired to care right now...

4 years and counting

2011-07-08T23:46:00.005+08:00

It only seemed like yesterday that I chatted over the Internet with this ex-schoolmate whom I have never spoken to, back in school. And then last night, we celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary. It is so surreal that I had been so blissfully married to this man for four years already!

He had a lovely bouquet of my favorite white roses delivered to my office. Then I was picked up and whisked to a secret location for wine and dine when I got off work.

We had a bottle of champagne, followed by a bottle of white wine on the top of Singapore, at Altitude. The view from our table was magnificent! It has been such a long time since the two of us hung out at bar; without the kids, everything seemed so much more romantic!

Mr Hubby might not be perfect but he is perfect for me. He is everything I am not; he is like logic, while I represent absurdity. And together, we make life a little more balanced.

Since Mr Hubby travelled at lot for work, some friends were concerned and asked if I am ever worried about bitches and sluts stealing him from me. To me, marriage is about respect and trust; and I believe Mr Hubby would feel the same way about it too.

But anyway, sluts or no sluts, he had already been stolen away from me by Iphone and Ipad 2! He holds them more than he holds me! LOL!!

Obedient Wives Club

2011-06-22T23:47:00.001+08:00

What can you do to prevent your husband from being unfaithful?

Become his prostitute! No, not just any street hooker but a first-class "elite-type" one. This is the solution given by the V.P of the controversial Obedient Wives Club. OWC was first set up in Malaysia, then Indonesia; it proclaimed to be able to cure all social ills from divorce to incest to prostitution, as long as the wives are submissive and keep their husbands busy with some of the most mind-blowing sex!

She went on to say, "...as wives, we must treat our husbands better. It’s not just in bed, but everything that a wife can offer. Optimise your role. If we provide our husbands more than a prostitute can give, then our husbands will not go out looking for it.”

Sure. Only if the husband can pay the wife top dollars too. Do you have any idea how much it will cost a man to engage the service of that first-class "elite type" of prostitute, who can make him feel like a million buck, both in and out of bed? An overnight session with a social service escort in Singapore will cost somewhere around $5000-$8000. Don't believe me. Just google it.

There had been news that OWC might be setting up a branch here in Singapore. So do our husbands really want elite prostitute type of wives? My take is: then invest in your wives. Because if you don't, you will only end up with wives like the 'Geylang Chickens'! You get what you are paying for? So don't compare and don't complain.

Me? Oh, I must be the most obedient wife, if not where do I get my Chanel, Louis Vuitton and the subsidy for liposuction. Hahahaha...

But joke aside. Marriage is always a two-person thing. So guys, if you want a Julia Roberts, then you gotta be Richard Gere right?!

Behind Close Door

2011-06-15T22:24:00.001+08:00

Never share a toilet cubicle with your pre-schooler. You want to know why. Read on.

It was just one of those days when we were out shopping in the mall and I needed to pee. I had to bring my daughter, Laetitia, along because if I didn't, she would be asking for the toilet at the most inconvenient timing later on, like right in the middle of a sumptuous dinner. And then my appetite would be ruined.

So we entered the toilet, there was a short queue, we waited for a while and suddenly I was feeling really high tide (I think the smell of the loo must have triggered my bladder). Finally a cubicle was available, I dashed in and felt a little disappointed because it was a squat type not a sit-on one. But I seriously needed to go so I quickly pulled Laetitia into the cubicle, turned around, pulled down my panties, squatted and peed.

It was at this instance that I heard a shriek breaking the silence of the toilet. "EEEKKKK!!... BLOOD! MOMMY! BLOOD!" Laetitia, who was standing behind me, had seen the unthinkable.

I tried to ignore her but she wouldn't stop. "Mommy, your pee pee has blood!" "How come there is blood, Mommy?" "So yucky... Blood! Blood! Blood!"

"OK. OK. Mommy is having my menstruation. I am not peeing blood" I decided to give my three and a half year old, a quick lesson on female reproduction system. "It's just a very natural biological reaction."

"What's men-train-station? Why men-train-station will have blood? So yucky, know." My inquisitive daughter wouldn't stop. I wished that I had masking tape in my pockets.

When I opened the door of my cubicle, the queue of toilet-users was waiting to see the face of this 'men-train-stationing' mom.

Nevertheless, I survived the embarrassment. My skin had thickened up quite a bit after becoming a mother, or so I thought.

Then a few days after, I had to drive Laetitia to school because our regular chauffeur, Mr Hubby, was out of town on a business trip. Our car barely left the condo's carpark when I felt an immense pain in my tummy and had even leak out a fart. I knew then that I could never make it through the horrendous morning traffic to reach my office without shitting my pants, so I pulled over and dashed for our condo's public toilet, with Laetitia in tow.

And there we were in a same toilet cubicle, again. I couldn't possibly leave her alone in the car. But this time, I thought I was smarter because I preamp her of what was to come and made her promise not to speak a word inside the cubicle. She was quiet. I was happy.

When we arrived at Laetitia's school, 15 minutes later than usual, her teacher greeted us at the door "Morning Laetitia, you come late today."

"Ya. My mommy stomachache, then just now she go to the toilet poo poo. So smelly, know." reported Laetitia.

Upon hearing that, the teacher and another parent tried very hard to suppress their giggles. I hung my head lowly in shame.

I regret not learning my lesson the first time.

Maybe, I should really consider carrying masking tape in my pockets.

My Pretty Boy

2011-06-10T22:19:00.004+08:00

花美男 - loosely translated as 'flowery pretty boy', are men who are gorgeous, sexy, not macho but beautiful. They are such a hit in countries like Japan, Korea and Taiwan.

Pictures taken from Yutakis

This is my own pretty boy, Leonitus. I have not seen any Chinese baby boy with lashes longer and curlier than his. His peaches and cream colored skin tone and his rosebud lips are the envious of all women. At the tender age of 16 mths, he is already a lady-magnet.

But I am really not keen to see my boy grow up into this metrosexual guy who buy more clothes or has more cosmetic procedures than his own mother. Maybe I should really stop putting flowers on his head and buy him a toy AK-47 instead.

Dad

2011-06-07T17:26:00.005+08:00

Father's Day is just round the corner.

I don't remember ever celebrated Father's Day with my dad.

No, he didn't die when I was very young; in fact, my estranged dad is alive and kicking, somewhere. I don't exactly know where. He had given me his name card, but I think I had misplaced it already.

My parents divorced when I was young. My dad deposited my brother and I with our grandparents while he formed another family. We used to see him, once a month, then once every few months, then once every Chinese New Year. Then, occasionally once every few years. Now, once in a blue moon when we bumped into each other on the street.

So much had been reported on the importance of an involved father in the growth and development of a child. Children with dads who are active in parenting, perform better in school, show lesser behavioral problems, are more confidence and have greater chance of being successful when they grow up.

It is believed that young women often look for men resembling their own father; and if their fathers had been dirt bags in their growing years, you can imagine the kind of disaster that are awaiting the future of these women.

If you could close your eyes and recall the images of your dad in your childhood, what was it like?

Did you see your dad bringing you for walks? Did he carry you on his back? Did he read to you at bedtime?

Or was he never around when you needed him? Is he cold, distant, unapproachable or punitive?

To those dads who have eyes glued to your Iphone/Ipad all the time, is that how you really want your children to remember you by when they grow up?

************************

I closed my eyes. There was an image in my mind - a still and invisible figure.

I guess, that must be my dad.

Happy Father's Day, Daddy, wherever you are.

Star Cruising

2011-05-28T23:56:00.004+08:00

We have done it again; travelling without our helper and this time we did it together with my brother and parents-in-law. We were on board Star Cruise's Super Virgo for a 3D/2N cruise to Pulau Redang, Malaysia.

I really love and hate travelling with my kids. I love it when I see those precious smiles on their faces. I hate it because it usually brings out the worst in me. It is almost like this OCD got to me; working myself crazy to ensure that they are safe, well-fed and sleep soundly throughout the trip. Talking about being paranoid.

Anyhow, besides being rather short-fused whenever I travel with the young ones, I did have a good time swimming with the kids in Pulau Redang and enjoying the wonderful sea view from the balcony of our cabin.

And I have to thank my dearest Mr Hubby for helping me out with our kids, especially with Leonitus, who decided to give us a preview of his Terrible Two.

Now that we are more confident to travel with our kids, nothing will stand in our way for our next overseas trip in Sept. : )

More pictures of my two munchkins here.

Staring Cancer in the Face

2011-05-18T22:58:00.001+08:00

We have been planning to bring my mom for a short vacation coming Sept, when I told her I am giving her a trip to Phuket as part of her Mother's Day present, she was ecstatic. I was equally excited because I had always wanted to bring my mom abroad and finally I have the chance.

That was last Sunday. Since then, a drastic turn of event had shattered our exhilaration.

Three years ago, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, terminal stage. She had chemotherapy which gave her good results despite the fact that the cancer cells had metastasized to her lungs. After a series of chemo, she was put on a type of anti-cancer drug that was working well for her - until now.

During one of her BSE, she had detected lumpiness in her breast, so she asked for a Mammogram and a Breast Ultrasound. The results came in on Monday. It wasn’t looking good.

Her doctor had scheduled her for a CT scan and had talked to her about the possibility of mastectomy or another round of chemo.

My mom is devastated.

There had been a dark cloud looming above my head since then. I tried to tell myself that I should be grateful because we came so close to losing her the other time. These three years of borrowed time had given my mom the opportunity to travel to many countries that she had wanted to visit, witnessed the wedding of my brother, celebrated the birth of her two grandsons and made many new friends in her cancer support group.

Having lost my cousin, her niece, to breast cancer just months ago, it sure felt as though Death still lingers among us.

I know I can’t have her around forever but I do hope we would have another three more years, or if I could have it my way, another five more years, if that’s not being too greedy. It would mean so much to me and for my children, they would retain better memories of this grandmother who dote on them so dearly.

But having said that, my wish for her is to be blessed with having the quality of life, even if it means shortening the length of time we have of her. I just don't ever want her to suffer.

It has became much harder to stay positive confronting cancer for the second time, but I will have to find the strengthen to be my mom’s rock; I can’t crumble, not now, not in the future.

With this post, I am linking up with Shell for her Pour Your Heart Out Wednesday.

The Darndest Things That I Heard

2011-05-12T21:25:00.000+08:00

Do you remember watching this comedy talk show, hosted by Bill Cosby, "Kids Say The Darndest Things"?

I have exact one at home, who says the darndest things, sometime at the most inappropriate occasion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We were in the lift, Laetitia saw a lady eating banana, so she pointed to the lady and said, "Look, someone eating banana." "Yes." I nodded. "Eats banana... just like a monkey!" The lift door opened, I had to make a hasty exit or risk dying from embarrassment.

Another time, we were in the nearby mall, walking behind a rather obese woman. Laetitia suddenly commented, "Wow! She is so FAT! I don't like fat people." Luckily the mall was very crowded and too noisy for the woman in front to hear her.

Whenever my kids misbehave, I would give them a warning before making them stand at a corner. I would say something like, "Stop it now or you'll get into serious trouble!" Then one evening, the TV was showing a guy confessing that he was in some kind of trouble (can't remember his exact words). Laetitia turned to me and said, "See, he is in trouble, his mommy will ask him to stand at the corner!" I couldn't stop laughing.

Just now over at dinner. Laetitia was showing off some new Mandarin phrases which she had recently mastered and she had hardly touched her food. So I barked her, "Laetitia, quick, eat your dinner." She whined, "I can't finished. It's too much." "That's nonsense!" I shot back. To my biggest surprise, she said, "No. That's not nonsense. That's English." I almost fell off my dinning chair.

What would I do if I didn't have this good sense of humor?!

Those Who Are Special

2011-05-08T22:08:00.001+08:00

"All children are special to their parents.” If you are a parent, I believe you would agree with me.

But some children are born special; differently, far from the expectations of their parents sometime. They are the children with special needs – children with physical/mental disabilities, terminal/chronic diseases. They came to our world with hearing impaired, ADHD, Down Syndrome, Cerebral Palsy, Cystic Fibrosis, Autism, Asthma to name a few.

At the beginning, most families with these special needs children felt as though they had been single-out for punishment for the wrongs that the mankind had committed but fortunately many learned to accept and love their children for who they are along the way. Many go on to be amazed by the qualities of these children.

I have two very beautiful and lovable children. Both of them have sensitive airways. Their paediatrician says that they have 80% chance of developing asthma.

Leonitus, my son, had his first episode of Bronchiolitis when he was 2 months old and subsequently, he had so many recurrences that I had decided not to keep track. (His doc just reminded me, it was his sixth, last month.) He is sick practically every other month and he has been on daily medication of Singulair and Ventolin for the last 5 months but without much success to keep him away from bouts of respiratory infections.

When modern medication failed to safeguard Leonitus’s health, I became very anxious, trying all sorts of alternatives like TCM, buying all types of gadgets in the market that boasted their effectiveness in lowering respiratory-related allergies.

But even with our $3000 vacuum cleaner and an expensive humidifier, nothing much had change with the health of our two kids, in particular, Leonitus. This was the period of time, I felt very useless, defeated, deflated. I was directionless. There were many questions circulating in my head. ‘What is wrong?’ ‘Why can't he get better?’ 'Is it my fault?' ‘Why him?’ ‘Why me?’

But there had never been an answer.

For both my pregnancies, I have had neonatal screenings during the first trimester for fetal anomalies, in particular Down Syndrome. I was very sure that if the result had indicated any subnormalities, I would terminate my pregnancy and not consider bring the child to the world. I had recommended this screening to many preggy friends because I thought I was doing something right, but actually I was putting them up for a chance of moral dilemma. I was wrong, very wrong.

My paradigm completely shifted when I chanced upon the blog of Kelle Hampton, a mom who blog about her struggle, her acceptance and her celebration of life of her daughter, Nella, an extremely sweet little girl who has Down Syndrome.

Pictures from Kelle Hampton's blog - Enjoying the Small Things

I love Kelle Hampton's blog, because I find myself drawing strength from it. It had taught me to enjoy my children for who they are, in sickness or in health. More often than not, when we are micro-scrutinising our child's health issue, we forgot to take a step back and see beyond his/her problem, there are lots of potentials awaiting our discovery.

As of last month, Leonitus and Laetitia had both been 'upgraded' to a steroid-based inhaler and I have prepared myself for one, if not two, asthmatic kid in the future. However, nothing will change the way I am going to love them and I will raise them no differently from any healthy children.

This post is dedicated to all the mothers in the world who has never given up on their less than perfect children. Happy Mother's Day!

And special thanks to Kelle Hampton.

Better off 5 years ago?

2011-04-30T23:03:00.003+08:00

When it comes to politic, my attitude has always been, and would remains, apathy. So it irritates the hell out of me when it's time for General Election because good TV programs would be suspended for these politicians and politician-wannabes to come on air, appearing to be sincere and try to bribe, bluff, threaten and beg for the people's votes.

Then few days ago, I was sitting in front of my telly surfing for a good show to watch, Mr Hubby invaded and switched my channel. I don't know the title of that program nor do I care. To me, it was some politician pitching their 'sale talk'. Then one of the opposition raised a question, "Are you better off than you were five years ago?

That set me thinking...

This was me, five years ago, roughly about a month before I dispensed myself from that miserable life that I shared with my ex-boyfriend whom I had been with for the last five and a half year. His infidelity and irresponsibility had almost wreaked my life. I was physically, psychologically and financially damaged.

When I left him, I was in debt, I had no roof over my head, and not too many people to turn to. I seek shelter in a very filthy house which I suspected was haunted. Over the years of numbing myself when I was with my ex-boyfriend, my reliance on prescription drugs had messed up my health big time. My state of mind and my social relation were also in a huge mess. In short, my life was chaotic and I was all on my own.

So I made up my mind to clean up my life. In the beginning, I wasn't sure if I was capable to even move on but with sheer perseverance I was able to turn my life around.

I took on a new role in my job which put me on a vertical learning curve. It was hard, but I had the best job satisfaction and earned my first taste of dignity and respect which I had lost in those years hanging out with my ex.

I settled my highly over-due divorce (yes, I was even once married to a pig) and sold my matrimonial flat which I used the money to pay off my debts. Then I took up a loan and bought my first private condo which had its value sky-rocketed in the years that followed.

I met a wonderful man. Fell in love. Had his child. Married and had been blissful ever since. Last year, we welcomed our second child.

While, there had been ups and downs, recessions and job losses, I was never in any way affected long enough. I had grown to be resilient.

In these 5 years, I had built a career doing something that I like, own and co-own two private properties, became mom to two most lovable children and wife to the most wonderful husband, be the sponsor of a child in Mongolia, and enjoying every bits of life's luxuries. I am not just better off than five years ago, I am having the BEST time of my life!

So does that means my vote should go to the PAP?

I certainly don't believe any politicians or government can do a thing more, or (for the pessimestic) less, to my life than what I can on my own.

The question ISN'T 'Are you better off than you were?'

The question IS: 'Why wait or hope for someone to come and make your life better, when you can just make that change on your own?'

Lipo Re-work

2011-04-22T23:39:00.010+08:00

Just came back from my Medan lipo trip, now I am all swollen and sore, but very much looking forward to finally having a waist.

After having my arms and shoulders done at Medan in January, I am rather satisfied with the results and decided to have my waist, flanks, abs and lower back re-work with the same doctor. And I also had my fats transfer to fill up the dents on my butts left by Dr R, the first doctor whom I had lipo with.

Ever since first liposuction with Dr R from TCS at Central, I have always wanted to kick myself for making such a fucking bad choice. Besides being freaking expensive, Dr R's work is a piece of CRAP! There were unevenness everywhere and my lower back was simply untouched, except for the two pit-like scars and dents that he left behind.

I know it's bad of me to say this, but I really think he should just go back to be a goddamn GP because he is REALLY JUST A GODDAMN GP and a fucking plastic surgeon wannabe!

Anyway, coming back to Medan had really been good. The nurses and Jenny have all remembered me and came to the reception to welcome me. When I was on the OT table, screaming, the nurses held my hands and pat my shoulders gently to comfort and encourage me. And the doctor is an artisan who totally understand the silhouette of a woman, so unlike Dr R who work on me like some medical intern!

Look. I even had a souvenir for them - MY FATS. They had froze my fats and packed it for me to bring back to Singapore. It looks like a packet of curry! GROSS!

The nurses told me that I could use my own fats on my face as a moisturiser. I scooped out a tiny bit of my frozen fat and tried to spread it on the back of my hand and it melted into what felt like animal lard. Arrrggghhh!! It was disgusting! So I dumped it. Thanks, but I would prefer to use my SK-II.

Now the fun begins! Wound care. I have 9 of these which I have to meticulous clean them, dry them, pat iodine on them, apply medication to them, put on anti-bacteria gauze them and then cover ALL 9 of them up with gauze and surgical plasters.

Mr Hubby asked if this would be my last lipo. Hmm... I don't know but I really hope it would be the last. *fingers crossed.

Unsettled

2011-04-18T22:18:00.003+08:00

One day before I am due for travel and I have, not one, but two sick children. Plus more bad news from the kids' paediatrician - Laetitia has to "upgrade" from the normal Ventolin to a steroid-based inhaler. *shake head.

Makes me feel so bad to be away from home and away from them for the next three days. This sucks!

Parenthood... it is filled with too much surprises awaiting you and me. Too much.

Having a Daughter

2011-04-12T22:34:00.000+08:00

I always imagine the best thing about having a daughter is that you can go shopping with her, try on nice stuff and then camwhore together!

In reality, camwhoring to Laetitia means taking ugly pictures with funny expressions. The uglier, the better.

But still, it was fun hanging out at the mall with my daughter.

1 Month, Almost 4 Kilos Gone

2011-04-03T00:43:00.002+08:00

From 64.0kg to 60.8kg in 31 days.

I have lost close to 4kgs (3200g to be exact) in my first month of diet. *grinning. And I could still have my feast of crabs for dinner earlier! Salted Eggs and Creamy Pumpkin Crabs! Low-carb, no guilt, fingers licking good!

*********************

Mr Hubby hand-made me a poster, actually it was meant to be used for cheering me on at the Class 95's Stiletto Race, but I caught a cold a couple of days back and decided not to run for the race.

Because the poster is so beautifully done up by my sweetest hubby, it would be a waste not putting it into good use, so I would pretend that it is meant to cheer me on for my quest of weight-loss instead. Hmm... where shall I hang it? Right in the middle of our living room? Hahaha...

7kg more to target! GANBATEH to myself!!

Daddy's Little Girl

2011-03-31T21:30:00.012+08:00

We celebrated Mr Hubby's birthday a week ago and I have just the most heart-warming and funny little story to share about our 3 year old girl, Laetitia.

When we returned from our short, but very romantic getaway, there was a memorable present waiting at home for Mr Hubby. My mom who came over to babysit our two children while we were away brought Laetitia to the supermarket that morning. She asked if Laetitia would like to buy her father a present since it was his birthday. Laetitia nodded away in delighted.

My mom told her that she could choose anything and my mom would pay it for her. She brought my mom to the aisle where the beers are displayed. So here is their conversation (as according to my mom).

Laetitia: I want to buy beer because Daddy likes to drink beer.
My Mom: Ok. Popo buys for you ok? (Randomly grab a 6-pack bundle.)
Laetitia: No! Not so many.
My Mom: (Puzzled) Huh??? Why?
Laetitia: Daddy coughs. Cannot drink a lot. One enough. (Took a can of Chang beer from the rack.)

My mom told me her heart almost melted hearing those words from Laetitia. Our little girl really knows her father very well.

She also ask to buy some balloons. When they came home and my mom helped with the gift-wrapping and Laetitia picked a red heart-shaped balloon to go with her Daddy's present.

She is truly her Daddy's perfect little angel and I can't be more proud of her.

A Birthday Getaway for Two

2011-03-27T23:54:00.043+08:00

If you have been following my blog, you would know by now that I had an unforgettable 35th birthday, owing it all to my loveliest husband (better known as Mr Hubby in this blog). So when his birthday (which is one month after mine) was approaching, I was feeling stressful. It is unlikely that I can out-do him because I admit, I am not as romantic or as creative as he is. And I can't afford to buy him a Chanel bag, but I guess he has no use for a Chanel bag anyway.

So I secretly planned for a special birthday getaway just for him and I, without our two kids. We had a simple dinner and cake-cutting at home with the kids on the eve of his birthday and we set off for the hidden oasis of Batam, Tempat Senang, on the actual day of his birthday, without telling him where we were going.

I paid a premium to book for the Thai room because I read it on the review that it is huge and luxurious. It has 2 bedrooms (not that we needed to sleep in separate rooms), a very big bathroom, even a courtyard with a Turkish fish spa. How cool!

This room has rows of built-in wardrobe, but who is going to use it anyway. So I thought I put it into good use by camwhoring with it as the background.

I love the Turkish fish spa. The fish inside are really gigantic, not those small ones that you would get from our local fish spa places. Initially, I was intimidated by the size of the fish, but after I put my feet in, I love it straight away.

There are just 7 private rooms in this resort, so you would feel very exclusive staying here. There is an interesting room, called The Tree House; it is decorated with a Tarzan-feel and there is even a real tree running though it. Behind me is a hanging bed, very special indeed. Mr Hubby thought it was pretty kinky too.

After our relaxing 3-hour spa, we were starving, so we order a feast for dinner. The Famous Beer Can Chicken is a bit over-rated, but we enjoyed ourselves at the table nevertheless.

After dinner, we had a few games of pool. I lost 1 ball on the first game and was totally wiped out by Mr Hubby on the other two. I suck at pool, it's no secret.

The short getaway made us felt as though we were still in courtship. It is a good way to strengthen anybody's marriage, or was it just my good excuse to ditch the kids aside, to enjoy ourselves.

The next morning, breakfast was complimentary; it was simple and yummy. Then it was time for us to check-out, catch the ferry and return to our reality - work, kids and all.

It was a good 24 hours away from everything at home, all thanks to my Mom who came over to sleep and play with our kids. Hopefully, we don't have to wait too long to do this again.

Going Commando

2011-03-20T23:14:00.067+08:00

One thing being a mom had taught me, is to think on my feet. When you are out with a ~~monster~~ toddler or a preschooler, I swear, the most unexpected thing is just waiting to happen.

Some evening back, I brought my 3 year old daughter to a private dinner party with some good old friends. Half-way through the dinner, she told me she had to pee. What's new? It always happen right in the middle of a meal when we are out. No big deal, I can handle that.

We spent some time hunting for the hotel's public toilet, so when she finally got down to business, she was at the highest point of her "tide". The gushing pee and the half pulled down panties were the beginning of a disaster.

She wet her panties, very very wet. And those were her only panties under her nice, little, blue polka dots dress.

She brawled! Her cries and screams filled the tiny cubicle. She sobbed, "MOMMY, I WANT ANOTHER PANTIES. ANOTHER PANTIES. THIS ONE WET ALREADY! WET ALREADY!

She refused to stop crying or to leave the toilet unless I produce her another panties. But where the fuck can I get another panties?? We were in some public toilet and I am not David Copperfield.

She just went on and on about wanting new panties. She just wouldn't stop; I was driven nuts by her.

"Ok, ok, ok. You want panties, you will get panties. So shut up now!"

3 minutes later, we walked out of the toilet cubicle, with her tears streaked face lit with a sheepish grin.

When we returned to the dinner table, I had to tell Mr Hubby of our little drama back in the toilet. "So how?" Mr Hubby asked. "She is wearing my panties now." I whispered lowly.

"NO!! That can't be?! Your panties? So big, how to wear?" He was totally doubting my words.

I looked around to see if anyone was noticing, before I lifted Laetitia's dress up carefully, revealing the magic that I had created.

There under her dress, she was wearing my black panties, with knots tied to both corners.

Yes, I had gone totally commando. I removed my own panties and transformed them smaller, there and then in that cubicle, so that my little girl wouldn't need to have her butts chilled!

The most fortunate thing was - I worn pants, not dress or skirt, on that day!

14 Days Later

2011-03-15T22:48:00.003+08:00

That picture below was me, 2 weeks back, weighing in at 64kg at the start of my diet!! If you had been following my blog, you would know that I was 63kg, when I decided to lose some weight, but in just 24 hours I put on another 1 kg. No kidding! My weight skyrocketed as though I was a balloon and someone was blowing air into me so quickly.

So my diet officially kick started on 1st Mar. I am to restrict my in-take of carbs, which means goodbye to all things nice and sweet. No more desserts, breads, rice, noodles, crackers, chips and so much more.

So what have I been surviving on? Water and air?

No. These are what I had been eating. No, not just salad. Scroll down further.

Grilled Chicken with lots of greens, makes good lunch or dinner any time.

Chicken Mayo sandwich, without the buns - my favorite choice of snack.

I hadn't expect the Pan-fried salmons and broccoli to taste so yummy!

My hearty breakfast of turkey breast, bacons and eggs.

Fast food? No problem. Low carb burger from Carls Junior is something that I can enjoy while dieting.

Although I had stay away from tidbits like potato crisps, I found a delicious alternative - seaweeds!

Without ice-creams, my low-carb cocoa drink with whipped cream is the closest I can get.

I am eating all those and more, up to 5 times a day. When Mr Hubby saw the way I was eating, he asked, totally bewildered, "Are you sure you are on diet?"

Of course, I am on a diet, if not, how do you think I was able to lose 2kg in 14 days!

I went from 64.0kg to 61.9kg eating what most people on diet would stay far far away from. Unbelievable? Believe it!

My weight-loss battle continues...

I am a Woman, Hear me Roar

2011-03-08T00:45:00.002+08:00

Today is International Women's Day, a day when the world celebrates having us, women, the superior gender.

The gender of all mothers, the mighty beings.

The gender that chews off it partner's head and eat it for supper, after sex - the Back Widow spider.

The gender that draws blood and kills with dead viruses - the mosquito.

The gender with the capablity to produce milk to feed the young - all mammals.

The gender who got up, walked over and made a male bugger snubbed off his cigarette in an alfresco dinning, while the rest of the diners are just wimpily to suck in those cancer-causing smoke - yes, that's yours truly.

I paid to eat, not take in bloody second-hand smoke. So get the fuck out of here before I shed you to pieces! ROOARRRRR!!!!

NO to More Babies and NO to Tiger Mom!

2011-03-04T11:19:00.002+08:00

Can the revised Baby Bonus Package of Singapore entices women to have more children?

Definitely not me. THERE SHALL BE NO MORE BABIES FROM ME!

Why? Singapore is a clean and safe place, with high social and economic stability. Ironically it is also a terrible place to raise young children when you are a working mother from a middle-income family.

There are 168 hours in a week. I use 52 hours for working and commuting between home and office. My children use 84 hours for sleeping and napping, another 10 hours wasted on eating very slowly, poo-ing, throwing those much needed tantrums and other nonsense. That leave me with 3 hours a day for my children which also means each of my child gets only slightly over a hour of my time on a daily basis. What magical parenting do you expect out of me, a mother like that? It frightens me to imagine splitting those 3 minimal hours further with an addition of another baby. And did you notice that I had already run out of time for myself?!

4 out of 5 women whom I know returned to work after their maternity leave because there is a huge pressure to earn more money as raising a child in Singapore can be really expensive. But not before long, they become tormented by the fact that no amount of money can buy them time to spend with their children, even though money is still pretty essential for a comfortable home.

Because of the decision to return to the workforce, we, the working mothers often rely on domestic helpers and childcare centres to do most of the child-minding while we slog our butts off so that we can be qualify for some form of government incentives/relief which aren't of too much help.

Then when our children are older, we need to work even harder because there would be enrichment activities like swimming, dancing, drama, marital arts, music and not forgetting tuition, all offered to make parents who don't sign up on them seem like one really BAD parent.

Later, there is the stress of finding a top primary school and even if your child managed to squeeze into one, it would just means more stress to come.

Spelling, tests, examinations! Parents are expected to coach the kids no matter how drained our brains are after a long day at work, so that our children can score perfect 10 in their spellings and excel in all tests and exams. If you don't do it, you will be perceived as a lousy parent who don't care about your kids' education.

To avoid being judged, parents worshipped "Kiasu-ism" like as if it is some form of God. Parents who spent the night camping outside a preschool's gate so that they can enroll their child into the popular preschool are regarded as heroes by the other equally kiasu parents. In my opinion, that's just pure madness! It's just a fucking preschool, do you need to get so serious??

The educational system here is unforgiving! It is at best breeding clever morons who are apathy towards everything, except the Internet and video games! Schools are always about grades and positions; they are weak in character-building, put zero effort in talent appreciations and there is nothing empowering whatsoever. Everyday is filled with endless chores of homework, learning spelling, doing revisions and going for tuition, tuition and MORE tuition!! It's no wonder why kids associate learning to boredom and why they grow up totally clueless of what they want in their lives.

Yesterday, I asked a friend of mine, who is working mom, out, I told her I am flexible and she could choose any evening between Monday to Thur. She was apologetic as she couldn't make it on any of the given days, unless it's school holidays because her son had tuition everyday from Mon to Wed and Thur evening is dedicated to coach her son on spelling.

Her son is only in Primary 1 and he is technically not even 7 yet (born at the end of the year)!

I was beginning to become freakishly mortified!

I don't want to have my son facing the alphabets chart, the moment he learns to stand. I don't want to force my daughter to recognize some stupid Chinese characters, I HATE Chinese just as much! I don't want to be the one to tear my hair out teaching my children Maths. Numbers KILL! And I certainly do not look up to Tiger Mom, Amy Chua's dictatorial way of parenting. I think mom like her is the reason why some kids grow up psychotic.

I want to spent my very precious and limited time outside my work, with my children doing fun things that teaches about the essence of living, laughing at their silliest jokes and watching them grow, enjoy their childhood and letting them form their own identities. And then be proud of them no matter what their lives amount to be in the future, as long as they grow up to be a resilient and independent individual.

Ultimately, I don't want to breed some "champion show dogs" that looks great on the outside but suck at being wholesome. That's not how I envisioned parenting to be.

So ... does that make me a bad mother already?

D for "Do or Die"... or "Diet"

2011-02-28T01:16:00.000+08:00

I must have be soaking up just way too much bliss to put on THREE freaking kilos in one month. Blame it on CNY, V'day and my B'day, all happening in the month of Feb.

Although it was tough shedding those 20kgs that I had piled on having Leonitus, a year ago, my weight was coming down slowly in snail's speed. But at the very least, it had always been dropping not increasing. This is the first time for the last 12 months, the scale goes up instead of down. I am devastated! So devastated!

Quite frankly, I had been eating and eating and eating CARBS, CARBS and more CARBS recently. It was like suddenly, I developed a sweet tooth. I can't get enough of chocolates, cakes, bubble teas, ice-creams, pastries or anything and everything that I used to stay away from.

Now instead of having only three more kgs to go before reaching my pre-natal weight, I have SIX goddamn fucking kgs!!!

IT'S TIME TO GO ON A DIET!!!

My goal is to go from 63kg to 60kg by April 2011. And then go further down to 53kg before Dec 2011. Yes, I am stretching my goal to go down four more kilos, beyond my pre-natal weight, to a weight that I had never was for the last five years.

That would means losing 10 very impressive kilo before the year end. So... could I do it?

YES! I would do everything I possibly can to achieve this seemingly impossible mission.

So people, from 1st March 2011 onward, please help me by NOT offering me anything to eat. Thank you in advance!

35... and loving it!

2011-02-24T23:06:00.029+08:00

(PART 1) THE TREASURE-HUNT

I was on leave on my birthday so I had the luxury to sleep in and I didn't wake up until it was almost noon. The smiley face of my son, Leonitus, was the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes; he was beside me and had just woken up from his nap too. We cuddled and giggled, do the silliest thing, taking turns to suck his pacifier. What a lovely way to kickstart the day - my birthday!

Then I walked into the bathroom and saw this birthday greeting written on the mirror with a lipstick! Not my lipstick, I hoped. And then there was a piece of note, it seemed like a clue. Yes, it was indeed a clue to my birthday present! Treasure-hunting my birthday pressie? How exciting!!

"... a place where only you and me can access" That had to be our safe! That was a no brainer, come on I can do better than this! "Pressie, here I come!!"

What?! A key?!

"Key we use from Mon to Fri excluding P.H."... I was stubbed. I took that key and started poking into holes around the house, totally clueless. I gave up and text Mr Hubby to ask for more clues. But he thought I should be able to solve it on my own since I have always been a fan of crime shows like Mentalist and CSI. But don't he know that his wife is a bimbo?!

Finally after 90 minutes of wrecking my brain, I had a breakthrough. The key had to be for our letter-box! And sure enough, I found a nicely wrapped box sitting inside. I opened it up and there was yet another key! OMG!! I was beginning to hate KEYS!!

But this key was easy. It was the key to our second car, so I dashed out of the house again and make my way to the carpark. Found our car, opened all the doors, but found nothing inside the car. SHIT!! Where was it?? "Come out, come out, wherever you might be, pressie!"

Tried the car boot and there it was! A CHANEL box!! "Please. Don't let this be another key."

I opened up the box and WOW!!! A CHANEL bag. My first CHANEL bag!! YIPPY!!

I love it! I love it! I love it! I was jumping for joy right there in the carpark. Can you believe it?!

Poured everything from my LV bag into my birthday present and started using it immediately. Can't wait.

(PART 2) THE CELEBRATION

My mom volunteered to come over to help out with the kids so that I could go out for dinner with Mr Hubby, in peace. She gave me a red packet and bought me a birthday cake. I had a mini birthday celebration at home; singing happy birthday and blowing the candle out, much to the delights of my two birthday-loving kids.

I ate my cake with my two adorable darlings before bidding them goodbye to join Mr Hubby for our 'romantic' dinner for two, in a not so romantic place because I am definitely the unromantic one among us.

We went to The Line at Shangri-La Hotel for a sumptuous buffet dinner. I absolutely love oysters and sashimi. I ate close to a dozen oysters and so many more food. Luckily, I wasn't wearing anything tight fitted or I might just bust the seams of my dress.

Even though I was feeling so bloody full, I had some room reserved for desserts! The Creme Brulee and Tiramisu were simply too heavenly to be missed!

Apart from the delicious spread and my birthday surprise, I felt so loved by my husband. He is just the sweetest, although he is a man of few words. Anyway, who need a talkative husband, I don't.

Ooohhh... I am soaking up the bliss!

And I 'heart' my mom who has always been there for me and my kids. Mommy, you rock!

I am truly blessed to have this life. I had never imagine turning 35 to be so awesome! It's crazy, but I think I am beginning to like growing older! I am so looking forward to my 36th birthday... (more like, I can't wait to get my second and third and fourth CHANEL bag! LOL!!)

Something about the Foreign Domestic Helper (Maid)

2011-02-17T00:36:00.029+08:00

The bewildered look on the faces of people, whenever they learnt that we leave our baby alone at home with our foreign domestic helper when we go to work, can be quite amusing. They would express deep concerns; telling us how we shouldn't trust the maid and all the horrors they had heard about abusive maids. I listened but do not necessarily agree.

What would they think, if they hear about how my helper is allowed to visit the library, the mall near our home and the neighbour's homes and sometimes we even bring her along for overseas holidays, I always thought.

My helper is open with me about having a boyfriend, but that doesn't bother me too much because her boyfriend is working in Malaysia and she knew him when they were back in Indonesia. She also has a lot of female friends, some are the other helpers working within our condo compound.

I permit some closer ones to come over to our place (not without my knowledge), and they are actually quite nice people who bake us cakes and make us pineapple tarts during CNY. Sometimes when I forgot to buy something after returning from my grocery trip, I would enlist their help to buy it for me if they are on the way to the supermarket. When my kids are at the playground, they keep a eye on them for me.

My helper knows just how to relax herself; she is definitely into work life balance. She has not one but two mobile phones and she received more calls and SMSes than myself and Mr Hubby combined. And oh, she even Facebook, but she is not on my friend list. I give her one day off every month, but occasionally if she needed some time off, like a couple of hours to meet a relative/friend or to run her personal errand, I might also grant her request.

I respect her religion; she allowed to fast during the Muslim fasting month and she is also allowed to pray in our home as long as work gets done. If we eat pork, we will get her something else to eat, separately from us. During Christmas, she received gifts from Mr Hubby and me. She gets 'ang pao' for Chinese New Year; presents and cakes for her birthdays too.

You might think that my helper is one of the most fortunate FDH in Singapore, but I am merely doing my part as a fair employer because I am an employee myself too.

My helper has been a great help to my family these two years. She is diligent, has good initiative, is positive and possesses willingness to perform. She whipped up tasty meals for us when we return from our offices. She does all the housework and washes our 2 cars to our satisfaction. She also has genuine love for my kids and she is able to look after them wholeheartedly, despite the ridiculous amount of phone calls and SMSes she gets everyday. But that's just her. She loves to talk and network, apart from that, I must say she is doing a fairly good job.

Of course, she didn't start out quite like now. Despite giving her a written guideline and aligning our expectations right from the beginning, she stole Mr Hubby's mobile phone on her second month with us. But I told her everyone deserve to be given a chance and she was truly sorry about her misdeed. It was after the incident that she became committed to working for us. She knew I was dead serious when I told her, "For me, nobody deserve more than ONE chance."

As she gets better with her work, she was able to access to more privileges and freedom, which also becomes a motivation for her. She also began to understand my style of employment. If you are good, you will be treated better. If you are no good, you will be trained for the better. If you are un-trainable, then YOU BETTER LEAVE. I am nice but firm, strict but fair, compassionate but rational.

There are many employers in Singapore who complain about their helpers, most commonly referred as their maids. I have my encounter of FDH from hell too, but I really do believe that not all FDH are outwardly bad. By denying them of day off, forcing them to work round the clock, cutting their contacts with the world beyond our own homes, disrespecting their religion, and treating them in a dehumanized way, aren't their lives worst than prisoners? Btw, most prisoners are allowed to have visitation from their families and recreation time.

I do not know about you but I believe a happy employee makes a happy employer and my happy helper definitely contribute to raising my sunny kids.

(Pictures above are courtesy of our helper.)

A peep into the perspective of a FDH in Singapore. Read the story of a maid, maybe you, as an employer, would become more empathic knowing that we are interdependent on these FDH, just as much as they needed us.

Instead of blame on bad luck, changing one helper after another, why not be pro-active in setting the expectation straight and incorporating a workable plan to improve the performance of your current helper. I am sharing my personal tools to help employers in Singapore foster a better working relationship with their FDH (see below).

For a sample of FDH work progress report checklist that I used to evaluate and improve the performance of my helper, click here.

For a sample of guideline, expectation and entitlement that I used, click here.

Good luck, even though you would need more than just luck to find the perfect helper.

The Paradox

2011-02-10T23:27:00.020+08:00

I remember I started blogging regularly when my memory kept failing me because of my addiction to sleeping pills and some anti-anxiety drug. I found blogging a good way to archive pieces of my life that I render worth remembering.

That had been some 5 or 6 years back. Now blogging has become a way of life for me, it is a mean for me to stay connected to my friends because my social life after 2 kids had been reduced to null. It was therapeutic to blog about adversities; it brought about a sense of deliverance. Blogging has remained as one of my best self-administrated psychotherapy, most importantly it is drug-free.

The years of blogging has brought about a good stream of readers to my 'explicit world'. I get an average of 100 hits per day but I can only relate to a very small fraction of these people because there have been only 21 identifiable person who follows my blog publicly. And add another dozen of my friends who told me they read my blog like some publication whenever they are free because it is entertainment at zero cost.

So until the day I die or stop blogging, which ever comes first, I wouldn't have really know who has been peeping into my life on a regular basis. At times, this mysteriousness intrigues the hell out of me.

Having said that, I am uncomfortable with the idea of having someone walking up to me, doing a revelation in the middle of a busy street. NO, although I maybe curious but I don't want that. Why? Because I think I am not diplomatic to handle such a situation. I am not ready. Not prepared. I suck at it, even to my own surprise.

When Laetitia's principle and one of my ex-boss told me that they read an entry from my blog, I lost my tongue to the cat, even though I was feeling quite honored. I hadn't expect them, person-of-authority, to care to read my silly blog. That instance, a sense of embarrassment overwhelmed me. Why the fuck? I don't understand why I felt that way, but I do. I think I need lesson/coaching to fix this before folks start suspecting that I ain't the writer of this blog, judging from my uneasiness.

I like the spike in traffic to my blog but it made me feel more exposed. It is paradoxical.

Recently, things started to get a little bit creepy for me. My best friend, L, told me that one day, her co-worker from another department whom she is not too chummy with, spoke to her about me, She told L that she reads my blog and it happened that I mentioned about L in one of my entry, that was how she knew L is my friend. WOooaaAH! I am that famous already?!?!

Then today, something made my skin crawled. I received a message in my FB's inbox from a stranger. This was how it goes:

Stranger : hey... r u still blogging? :)
Me : yes. stil blogging.
Stranger : icic... juz saw... anyway, mind adding me? haha.. if nt is ok.. :)
Me : sori, it is reserved for people whom i know as friends beyond the virtual world.
Stranger : oic.. understood... well..i tink i saw u b4 bt nv approached u... my eldest sis stays at 'The Warren' last time... saw u a couple times... wif ur baby

WOW!! I WAS TOTALLY FREAKING OUT!!!!!!!!!

Because whenever I bring my kids downstairs, I have NO makeup, wore T-shirt and shorts that I would normally wear to bed and my hair is like... some bird nest!! And there are times I probably have not even showered!! And this stranger can recognize me in that horrid state??!!

I do feel a little stalked with that message. Yes, I am no celebrity but still..... it doesn't feel too good to know that I was been watched, even though I am public about my private life.

Please. Do me a favour. Don't catch me when I am looking the worst of my worst. Don't "hi" me. Don't introduce yourself. Don't smile. Don't look at me. JUST WALK ON!

If you like what you read on this blog, just click the "FOLLOW" button and put a face to it. It would mean so much to me knowing who you are, in this civil and subtle manner. The button is at the right-hand side of the blog. Go find it.

Lipo @ Medan (Part 3 of 3)

2011-01-31T22:27:00.133+08:00

The first week after liposuction was the hardest to get by, because the areas that went under knife would be so sore. On top of that, the whole body feel rather bloated up; not to mention the the amount of inconvenience that followed. No wonder many people, including myself, would experience bouts of regret and self-doubt for having had the procedure.

I had to wear the compression sleeves on my arms as often as 24/7 but they caused me to itch, I could only manage at most 12 hours a day. If I don't wear those damn compression sleeves, the edema of my arms would take a longer period to go off.

I had to clean and bandage my wounds which was really a hassle and instead of dressing the wounds for a week as recommended, I gave up after the next day upon returning to Singapore. On the third day, I just past band-aids over the wounds. After the fifth day, I can't even be bother with those band-aids, I just left the wounds exposed. Fortunately, the wounds healed up very well.

Then there were the bruises that I had to hide, so I had to wear something long-sleeves all the time whenever I was out. Once I wore my short-sleeves T to the nearby mall with Mr Hubby. He was rather uncomfortable being seen with me because he was afraid that someone might thought of him as a wife-basher. LOL!

(Picture of the bruises, taken on the 6th day post-lipo)

Fortunately, the bruises didn't take too long to go away, after that the scars were so tiny that they resembled some mosquito bites. I was already able to wear most of my clothes after the second week even though the arms still feel slightly swollen and rather numb at parts.

(Picture of a scar, taken on the 6th day post-lipo)

My jowl healed really good and the scars beside my ears were almost invisible but I hadn't really see any significant different to the shape of my face. Maybe there wasn't too much fat over those areas to begin with anyway. Waste my money to have it done!

(Picture of the bruises of my jowl, taken on the 6th day post-lipo)

After 19 grueling days, the results are finally beginning to show. I am starting to get compliments; some had assumed that I lost some weight, but actually the scale didn't move a bit at all. With the arms looking slimmer than before, it really felt fantastic.

I have to ditch the compression sleeves for body-stocking (it is stocking like material shaped like a long-sleeves blouse), because the itching was unbearable for me. So it might take me longer than 6 weeks to see the final result of my arms because I ain't very consistent in keeping the garment on.

To pay the price for a pair of better sculpted arms, it goes beyond just monetary. The muscles on both of my arms are still very tight, when I stretch my arms backward, I can't go any further than my neck! I certainly hope this is not permanent. There are still some lumpiness under the armpits which can be quite painful when massaged, however if I don't massage them, they might take forever to disappear.

Overall, I am quite satisfied and would be going back to have my back, flanks and upper abs revised. All thanks to my last doctor who did the Vaser Liposelection, he totally SUCKS. I really have to get those dents, bumps and waviness fixed so that I can one day put of my bikinis without feeling so self-conscious of my very uneven body.

*I would probably post the before and after pictures of my arms in another month or two when the results are more obvious.

Lipo @ Medan (Part 2 of 3)

2011-01-28T00:18:00.001+08:00

On the second day of my arms' liposuction, this was the MOST traumatic day of the 4-days trip. I had my first post-lipo drainage and I almost died from it. Ok, not that serious but it was so goddamn painful that I cried. Jenny helped to wipe away my tears with a piece of tissue paper. The nurses teased me non-stop. They said I was so brave the day before, at surgery, and here I was totally reduced to tears being massaged.

But this wasn't any massage, all post-lipo drainage massage are murderous, regardless of where I had it. I remembered mine in Singapore was just so bad!

Many times, I had to yell, "STOP! STOP! STOP!" And the nurses had to cajole me to let them continued. I think I must had scared the rest of the patients with my cries and howls.

All breakfasts were complimentary, I had fried maggie mee which was surprisingly very delicious! Jenny would helped to "ta pao" lunch and dinner for all the patients. For dinner, I had the BEST ayam penyet ever! So yummy, I almost swallowed the bones!

I spent day 2 lazying around on the bed watching TV and DVDs, surfing net, yelling throughout my drainage massage, having facial and IPL done, as part of the 'Triple X' facial package that I signed up for SGD $198. The price was quite reasonable for a 2-hour facial, 1 IPL and 1 RF, but I didn't see any significant results post-treatment. I think those SK-II Facial Treatment Masks I have at home works better anytime.

That evening, there was came a knock on my door, I had expected it to be Dr Arthur but to my surprise.. actually it was more like SHOCK, Mr Hubby appeared at my room's door!! How on earth did that happened?? I had not give him the clinic's address, I merely told him that I would be in Medan for liposuction. I was like, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! HOW DID YOU FIND ME?!"

I was grateful to have him taking time away from his work and flying into Medan to keep me company. But the words that came out of his mouth wasn't all too pleasing. What did he say? He said, "Wow! You look like you had just been ran over by a truck!" -_- There goes all your brownie points, my dear.

I didn't sleep well that night because I was beginning to swell up; the water retention was so bad that my fingers looked like some freaking sausages! I always curls up, sleeping in a foetal position, with my arms hurting, I just had to sleep on my back which I really hate. So that night, I had a hard time trying to find the best position to dreamland.

It was the third day, I could finally shower; my scalp was oozing out a ton of oil! YUCKS!! After smelling great again, Mr Hubby and I went to Sun Plaza, the most popular mall in Medan for lunch and some shopping. There wasn't much for us but we bought quite a number of things for our kids. I bought some local food from the store opposite the clinic, but they weren't really up to my expectation.

When we came back, Mr Hubby had a 2-hour body massage and I had RF treatment done on my face. I ordered the very yummy ayam penyet for Mr Hubby, while I had ayam soto for dinner. Then we packed up our bags and watched more DVDs before turning in.

We woke up early in the morning to catch our morning flight back to Singapore. The driver didn't turn up to fetch us to the airport as instructed, so Dr Arthur drove us to the airport personally. We thanked him and flew back safely to Singapore by Silkair.

Despite feeling really quite sore, I hugged and carried my kids the moment I reached home. It kills me to be away from them for so many days. I missed them terribly and I was feeling very guilty not being around especially when Leonitus fallen sick while I was in Medan.

My arms were very bruised and swollen; water retention of my armpits had reached new height, it was as though I had two water-beds wedged between those pits. I couldn't help but felt slightly depressed. However, these are all just too normal post-lipo, I just need to persist on.

(..... to be continued.)

Positive Parenting - Why some parents just won't do it?

2011-01-23T22:55:00.007+08:00

Laetitia has been put on Singulair too, because she had caught the virus and is wheezing just as much as Leonitus. So with her already challenging personality, Singulair just made a much BIGGER monster out of her. Isn't parenting exciting or what!

When she accidentally dropped her cake at Leonitus' birthday bash yesterday, she burst into tears and was howling as though the world was coming to an end. Luckily, there was this 7 or 8 year old little boy, who is my cousin-in-law's son; he comforted Laetitia and tried to cheer her up by giving his own little charm (the ornament on the cupcake that Laetitia was really into collecting) to Laetitia.

I was very impressed. I praised the boy and turned to his mother, told her how proud she must be of her son. However, I was surprised by what this mother had to say, "Aiya, he is like that. Very 'kaypoh' (busybody) one." The boy was deflated like a balloon upon hearing those words. "She (referring to his mother) is always like that. Whenever I helped somebody, she will say that I am a 'kaypoh'." The boy pouted at his mother being unsupportive.

I found myself jumping to the boy's defence, "No. I certainly think that your son is really nice." I hadn't give a thought if I would be coming across as offensive to this mother. I turned to the boy and told him, "Remember this. Compassion is your strengthen. You must feel proud of yourself and carry on being who you are regardless of what other tells you." The boy nodded and let out a weak smile.

I seriously do not understand why some parents do what they do. Putting their own kid down in front of others when he was actually being good?!?! Don't tell me this is Asian parents' way of teaching humbleness, I find that absolutely MORONIC! And coming from that mother who is highly educated and holding a respectable job?! I simply had to sigh.

When they are good, just fucking tell them that they are good!! Reinforcing positiveness is such an easy parenting tool. I see parents choosing punitive methods and humiliation as a form of discipline over positive reinforcement. Why do they even go there?!

I am an anti-spanking mother. I never hit my children but that doesn't mean I am being permissive and my children can push me around. HELL NO!! I just don't see what canning, whacking and smacking can possibly do to teach a child the proper way to behave because hurting another person physically ain't proper either!

I hear you, some parents, saying that the only method of discipline they ever know is the cane. Why don't you just fucking go and buy a book on positive discipline and then just follow the methods!? The truth is: parents who hit their kids are just losers who cannot contain their own anger. They probably need anger management themselves!

There will be parents out there who thinks I am just this fortunate arse who has well-behaved children that is why I don't have to resort to spanking them. I can't tell you how wrong you are to even think in such a way.

So if you think you child is naughty, is wilful, is lazy, is stupid, then he/she WILL BE! That is self-fulfilling prophecy at its very best. Money Back Guarantee!! To have better behaved children, the parent must first have their paradigm shifted.

I choose to believe that my children are fundamentally good, but at times they misbehave. I choose to believe they have good characters and it is then my duty to help shape them further. And no, that doesn't require smacking at all.

I know... the pro-smacking parents are looking to gun me down after this entry. Like I would care!! No fuck!

Lipo @ Medan (Part 1 of 3)

2011-01-22T23:57:00.001+08:00

My quest for a slimmer figure had brought me to Medan, Indonesia. My last Vaser Liposelection done at a local aesthetic clinic had left me very disappointed. My abs were poorly sculpted and there are multiple areas with dents and waves. And there was my lower back and flanks, which seemed totally untouched except for the two incisions scars.

Those were good enough reasons to not return to that same clinic and doctor when I want to lipo my arms. After reading about this doctor in Medan from some forum and seeing many of his works on the Internet, I decided to take a chance and flew over to a foreign land to continue my lipo quest.

I took a Silkair flight, but I should really be alright just taking a budget airline because the flight only took slight over a hour. The clinic's driver picked me up from Medan airport and drove me straight to the clinic where I was greeted by the Customer Service Officer, Jenny and two nurses at the reception area. The walls of the clinic were filled with various certificates and photos of the doctor with some famous plastic surgeons and even with the president of Singapore!

The clinic... should I really be calling it a clinic? It is a three-storey twin-building, very BIG; it is equipped with operating theatre, dance studio, facial spa, kitchen and as many as ten bedrooms in the building. I stayed in room number 2, while the doctor stayed at Rm #1. It sure felt like a VIP to stay next-door to the doctor. My room is air-conditioned, spacious and clean, it has a queen-sized bed, wardrobe, a dresser, TV, DVD player and wireless Internet connection. There were also two drawers full of DVDs at the hall but all the discs were pirated! The best feature in the clinic was the Skype phone which I can make as many calls to Singapore as I desired and it is absolutely free of charge.

After I put down my stuff, the nurses ushered me into the consultation room where I met Dr Arthur for the first time. My impression of him was, he is very chatty for a doctor and he is very frank, to the extend that it might come across to some as blunt.

I had intended to lipo my arms as well as to revise the work of my flanks and lower back, but Dr Arthur weren't keen to tackle so many areas at once. He told me he would rather concentrate on one area at a time so that the result would be good instead of trying to do too many and not achieve what I really would have wanted. So in the end , I chose to do my arms and my jowl, as for my flanks and lower back I will have to save them for my next trip.

The consultation was detailed even though Dr Arthur spoke very fast, but it was alright for me because I wasn't new to liposuction anyway. After the consultation, IV drip was administrated, followed by some sedative; I could feel my heart rate and breathing slowed down. Then I was given a pill, the nurses told me it was a sleeping pill. The doctor marked and then painted the areas that needed to lipo with a brown liquid which I believe it was iodine.

Now I was ready for the op. The nurses placed pieces of gauze over my eyes and each time they lifted the gauze to check, my eyes were be opened, they will tell me to go to sleep, but I can't sleep. In fact, I believe I was awake throughout the op and was aware of most things that were going on but it wasn't frightening and I did not feel any pain. It was all kind of ... twilight.

The op lasted less than three hours and I was transferred to a recovering room for the next 5 hours, where I was strapped up to machines that monitor my heart rate and blood pressure. The nurses would come in frequently to measure my temperature. After lunch, I tried to catch some sleep but it wasn't too successful.

Finally I was allowed to go back to my room; I was all bandaged up. Jenny ordered some noodle for me for dinner but I was too tired to eat and I fell asleep at about 7pm.

Around 10pm, I heard knocks on my door, I dragged myself out of bed to open the door and was surprised to see Dr Arthur in his t-shirt and shorts. He told me that he just wanted to check on me because he came by earlier at 8pm but I didn't wake up then and he was a little worried.

After the doctor's visit, I fell asleep quite quickly and didn't wake up until 5am in the morning. And of course, I was starting to feel quite sore on those areas that I had lipo. I knew then that the toughest part of lipo had began.

(.... to be continued)

I Want to Trade In

2011-01-17T15:09:00.002+08:00

I thought I was winning the battle before I left for Medan last Wednesday; Leonitus' cough seemed so much better. Then I phoned home on Thursday and received the bad news; he was running a temperature -- a rather high one too.

My mom and maid brought him to the paediatrician at Railway Mall because his regular paediatrician at Kidslink CCK wasn't open, but I really have no faith with the doctor there. As I predicted her medication were those very common ones and they weren't helping Leonitus at all.

Yesterday, I brought Leonitus to the Eu Yan Sang Clinic at Sembawang. After my last near success with TCM, I was really hoping for this alternative to work out well for him. To my surprise, the clinic is very modern; it even has a hip playroom for its young patients. My thought for EYS was really some 'atas' (high-end) shit for TCM, but the consultation plus medications were really cheap compared to a trip to the kids' paediatrician.

Somehow the words of the EYS's physician weren't too resounding. Actually, no, it provided me with nearly zero confidence. I could almost sniff out a huge sense of doubt she has with herself and TCM all together when she told me that I might want to go hand in hand along with Western medication because TCM's effect might not act quick enough for Leonitus. She said Leonitus's lungs are getting too congested.

Last night, Leonitus' temperature shot over 38 degree again and he was coughing throughout the night. He wheezed and fought for air. My heart just broke into millions of pieces seeing him suffered.

I took urgent leave this morning to bring Leonitus to Winston Ng of Kidslink after he coughed and threw up all his milk. He was already not eating well and now with all that vomitting just how much more can he take?!

Dr Ng diagnosed him with Bronchiolitis AGAIN! This is the fourth time and Leonitus is barely one year old!! WTF!! Just what can I fucking do to keep him well?!

Now everything is back to square one. It is the antibiotic, the nebulizer, the Singulair, the Ventolin and all those Western medicines that made him and me crazy, that I had choose to stop back then, they are all back once more!

It's such a fucky feeling to watch your kids fall ill and you have absolutely NO POWER to make them feel any better. It's sickening to be this vulnerable. I hate it!

I, Cindy Cheong Shin Yih, is prepared to trade in 10 years of my life, in exchange for good health of my children. Any takers, God or Devil? I don't care, just fucking take my life and make Leonitus/ Laetitia well again!

UPDATE @ 6.30pm:
Laetitia came home from school with a fever; her nose is stuffy and things aren't looking too good for her too.

Crocodile, Monkey and Worm

2011-01-09T00:14:00.003+08:00

These are what I have been feeding my son, Leonitus, these days.

Leonitus has been coughing for more than a month. He had tried the medication, the nebulizer, the inhaler but nothing seemed to keep him well past a week. His paediatrician recommended that I put him through a month of Singulair, a drug that helps prevent asthma.

As soon as Leonitus was on Singulair, I started to feel that he was a bit ~~violent~~.. erm... different. No, he wasn't getting healthier but he was becoming more aggressive, easily irritable and some nights he would wake up screaming as if he had a terrible nightmare. His usual meekiness was almost gone overnight. It was quite scary.

So I had Singulair read up on its website and was shocked to discovered that those changes that I had experienced with Leonitus wasn't my imagination at all. They were indeed the side effects of this drug. Without hesitation, I stopped giving Singulair to Leonitus, even though this would means I am taking chance with my son's health.

And that put me at my wit's end so I turned to TCM. I stopped the liquid Ventolin and whatever Western cough elixir, I started giving Leonitus, Hou Zao San, a Chinese Herb, derived from parts of a monkey, in powder form.

I bought crocodile meat to cook together with brown rice, as porridge, or I would use a large chuck of crocodile meat to double-boil with some wolfberries, red dates as soup.

Then once a week, I would make tonic with Cordyceps, which are really some fungus that invade worms to form this very expensive TCM ingredient, in fact, it's more expensive than GOLD!

So the sample menu of Leonitus looks something like this:

Breakfast:
Milk and Monkey Powder

Lunch:
Crocodile Brown Rice Porridge

Tea:
Milk and Monkey Powder

Dinner:
Rice with Worm Soup

Supper:
Milk and Monkey Powder

Who would like to have some of the yummies above too?

Poisoned!

2011-01-03T16:17:00.003+08:00

My first entry for 2011 and I am sorry that it had to begin this way.

We were poisoned!!

Food poisoning greeted us 5 hours after the midnight of 1st Jan 2011, claiming Laetitia as its first victim. It was a trip to KKH but fortunately she wasn't admitted because the vomiting stopped after the doctor squeezed a suppository into her ass.

Because we all ate the same food and she was the only one puking, so the doctor at KKH suspected Laetitia of having stomach flu.

On the same day, I started running to the loo too, but there was no signs of vomiting in my case so I dismissed it as a coincidence.

Then last night, Mr Hubby started to have diarrhoea and then today he was doing the merlion act. Oh.. what a poor thing!

That's the three of us, all displaying symptoms of food poisoning. And what do we all have in common before this? We ate the food prepared by our neighbor on New Year's eve for dinner. My helper and Leonitus were spared because the two of them did not eat any of those food.

Meanwhile Laetitia is well and had went to school this morning. Mr Hubby is running a fever and weak all over. Me? Other than visiting the toilet many times yesterday and the day before; there is this rambling in my tummy, I felt slightly nauseous and just farted few seconds ago. Guess, all the daily consumption of yogurt is paying off for me this time.

Oh.. and there was this bit of funnies that came out of Laetitia from this unfortunate event.

As it was the first time Laetitia experienced diarrhoea after she mastered doing her business in the toilet bowl instead of diaper, it shocked her to see that her poo "exploded" out of her butt and fragmented into tiny bits instead of looking well-formed like normal days. Laetitia was in tear when she said, "Mommy! I broke my poo poo!! I broke my poo poo!!"

I really should be comforting her but it was so amusing, I just can't stop laughing.

Yes.. Yes.. It did wish for adversity in my last entry, but I hadn't expect my "wish" to come through that fucking quickly. Now, can I changed it and wish for striking the lottery instead? Damn!

Latest update as of 6pm:
Our helper had started vomiting and having diarrhoea too. Perhaps the doctor at KKH is right, it might not be food poisoning after all; then it had to be Gastroenteritis as diagnosed by Laetitia's doctor. And this is worst because the latter is CONTAGIOUS!!!

On the last day of 2010

2010-12-31T00:24:00.003+08:00

I hope 2010 has been a fantastic year for you as it had been for me. On the last day of this year, would you be doing what I am doing; looking back and counting the blessings?

I started the year 20 kg heavier than the year before. After Leonitus was born, I shed half of that weight on the first month and for that I had to thank the horrible root canal job that left me wringing in pain for one whole goddamn month.

Then conjunctivitis swept across my family, sparing no one. What an experience for us to go through together as a family; feeling the same soreness in our eyes and tasting the same shitty bitterness of the medicines in our mouth when eye-drop was administrated had certainly strengthen the value of compassion in all of us.

It is a year that had prospered my children’s doctors. Laetitia experienced a grossly swollen ear at the beginning of the year and a brutally swollen leg at the end of the year, both brought about by the allergic reaction from the unthinkable, but very common thing like a mosquito’s bite. While Leonitus gave us a HFMD scare plus 3 episodes of bronchiolitis in a span of 6 months, which left his pediatrician to conclude that he had an 80% chance of becoming asthmatic in his growing years. No to mention the cough and cold which happened almost every other month, infecting one after another – very much like baton passing but in a bad way.

Myself? After KKH, Mount E, NUH, TTSH and Raffles, I added a new ~~hotel~~ hospital to my list of admission. I spent a teary night at SGH but discharged fit as a fiddle afterward. My cousin hadn’t been so fortunate; sadly I lost her to cancer some time back this year.

The year hasn’t been all smooth like Leonitus’ butt; at times it can be treacherous and it had got to me on some occasions. On the hindsight, I am grateful for adversity, because it teaches me to cherish every day, to have dreams and goals, to live in the moment, to make plans, to love my life – so I could die one day, without regrets.

So my wish for all of you in the coming year is to have a fulfilling and enriching year for your mind as well as your soul, even if it means going through adversities at some point of your life.

Oh… before I forget. Resolution of 2011:
To trim off that last 3 to 4 kgs of fat off my body (pun intended!).

Have a blast welcoming the New Year!

Just one of those funny moments

2010-12-25T16:35:00.001+08:00

The Twins from Matrix Reloaded VS Leonitus from The Ng Household.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!

It's going to be Christmas!

2010-12-23T22:54:00.001+08:00

I am ready for Christmas! The presents are spilling over from the bottom of our tree. We are going to need a bigger tree next year... or maybe lesser presents for the kids.

Our Virgin Road Trip - done without a helper!

2010-12-22T22:26:00.003+08:00

Last weekend, we drove to Malaysia for our first road trip and we did it without our helper. Yes! Just Mr Hubby and I, with our two ~~monsters~~ very active kids, no helper. On hindsight, it had been a rather suicidal attempt.

The traffic was extremely BAD. We left our home around 8am and was stuck for 3 goddamn hours in the massive jam. We weren't even going by Woodlands, we took the second link at Tuas. The traffic in KL was just as horrendous, by time, we checked into Westin Hotel, it was already 8pm. That was 12 freaking hours of travelling!

We just dropped our things and went over to Pavilion to have dinner at The Manhattan Fish Market. One of the managers was helpful to entertain the kids with toys and balloons; it certainly made our dinner less chaotic.

After dinner, we took a little stroll in and out of the mall, taking pictures of the mall's extensive Christmas decoration.

Coming back to the hotel, we took some picture of my favorite Christmas tree ever. The Westin Hotel had a really beautiful tree, it had the loveliest pink decoration, with lots of ribbons, feathers and shiny balls. I just love it so much! I bet my kids love it too!

The next morning, we went to a local eatery for breakfast. I shared my porridge with Laetitia and Leonitus, but as you can see, Laetitia wasn't a big fan of porridge for breakie.

Then we did a little bit of shopping around KL, but I bought nothing. I just find it very hard to shop for my things with the kids in toll. If you are a parent with kids like mine, you would understand why.

This was Leonitus in the crib, back at the hotel. He looked like a happy zoo animal in cage.

So we bid KL goodbye and headed to Port Dickson, where we stayed at The Legend Water Chalets.

We had a room with a very fantastic view, it was totally unblocked and we get the full view of the sea.

That evening, we went to a seafood restaurant for dinner, after learning that the Mexican restaurant I really liked, Le Cactus, had closed down. Such a pity.

As the kids weren't feeling too well, in fact, Leonitus was having his third episode of Bronchiolitis in 6 months, we skipped the swimming all together. So the huge bathtub in our room became the next best thing for the kids.

It was breakfast time, but the food really wasn't quite tasty. My kids weren't all too interested in eating too; my darling Laetitia, being innovative, started using the menu as a telescope and Leonitus was climbing all over the place like an ape!

After breakfast, we rested in the room for a couple of hours and then it was a long drive home, but not before we made a stop at JB to catch some dinner.

Finally we reached home, I was aching badly from head to toes, I popped 2 paracetamol and slept for 12 hours straight! This 3 days/2night trip was definitely more tiring than my everyday work in the office. But anyhow, we are very proud of ourselves for making the trip possible without a helper.

iPhone 4G - Should I or Should I Not?

2010-12-13T23:55:00.002+08:00

For someone like me who owns 2 blogs, checks emails almost everyday, has a twitter account and is active in Facebook, an iPhone 4G might seems like a really good Christmas present. Mr Hubby has been meaning to buy me a iPhone, but I kept saying no. He must be feeling quite puzzled.

But why not?

Don't be mistaken, I am not boycotting Apple, in fact, I would love to be an iPhone owner but I am putting up the greatest resistant against having another I.T related device at home. We already have a PC with 2 flat-screen monitors, 1 notebook, a O2 and a HTC smartphone which had 'retired' ever since Mr Hubby upgraded to the latest iPhone 4G. He has a company laptop and I, too, have a company laptop. That is AN AWFUL LOT of gadgets for the only two computer literate person at home.

So what?

For some parents, it might be alright to plant their children in front of the television all day long, they might let their children play computer or video games whenever they are not in school. They might think it's so cool to buy an iPad to keep their children entertained or even start a Facebook account for their preschooler. But I certainly would not want to join the league of these parents.

I believe a very small amount of exposure to mobile phones, computers or Internet in a controlled situation can be good for young children. However, most parents made the grave mistake of using I.T devices as their digital nannies, after seeing how their children are so drawn to one.

No doubt, I would love to have all of that peace and quiet moment but somehow I think it is wrong to leave parenting to a piece of artificial intelligence that teaches no emotions nor manners.

I have read report that shows that these info-technologies can be very addictive, while it affects almost anybody, it is particularly detrimental for children. The risk, they say, is that developing brains can become more easily habituated than that of those matured brain cells; so with Internet surfing and early exposure to digital media, the young minds are conditioned to constantly switch tasks, thus it is less able to sustain attention.

Just look at the rising numbers of young children with ADHD after the reign of the digital era. These brains are wired to distraction which makes them harder to concentrate and find it impossible to enjoy the harvest of deferred gratification.

Of course, I also read about how some toddlers and preschoolers' online games, which are very interactive and have strong educational content, can have positive effects building a child’s self-esteem and helps the child learns better.

Exposing young minds to computers or mobile phones is so controversial. But in my opinion, digital media will always remain as a double-edge sword.

I don't know about you, but I think I would like to raise my kids to be nature-loving, out-going and learning through play and books, the more traditional way. I feel that way, they can be healthier physically as well as psychologically.

I hate to imagine that I would come home from work one day, in the future, to see Laetitia viewing Facebook and not storybook or Leonitus surrounded by Apple gadgets but is apathy about how an apple tree looks like. Or worst, to see both my children addicted to living their lives out only in the virtual world, like the tragedy of the Korean couple who were so obsessed with online gaming that they starve their baby to death.

Meanwhile, I can still put up with my 'old-school' SonyEricsson mobile phone, while I decide what Christmas present do I really want from Mr Hubby.

Hmmm... an iPhone 4 would really be wonderful, wouldn't it. That's my love-hate relationship with the modern technology.

The Pacifier Fairy

2010-12-11T00:23:00.007+08:00

When it comes to weaning the pacifier off a baby or a toddler, every parents have something up their sleeves. Some bribes, some begs, some threatens, some ridicules, some nags, some uses creativity, some uses force, some just gives up and let the child brings the pacifier to primary school, and then prays that humiliation would kill the child!

I have restricted usage of pacifiers to bed and nap time for my kids. From the moment they wake up, the pacifiers would be taken away from them. In a way, it has/had been good, because my kids would associate pacifier with sleep and once the pacifiers are popped into their mouth, they are conditioned to fall asleep on their own.

However with Laetitia turning 3, I really want her to lose her pacifiers. She had 3, a yellow, a transparent and a transparent with some red - all old and smelly!

6 months to Laetitia's 3rd birthday, I started telling her about the story of "The Pacifier Fairy", it was inspired by one of Laetitia's storybook on the tooth fairy. I took the story and tweaked it to make it mine.

I told her that when she turns 3, the Pacifier Fairy would come and visit her because she would be old enough to 'donate' her pacifiers. The Pacifier Fairy is a fairy who gathers pacifiers from older children and give to little babies who need them more.

There is even a ritual to send her pacifiers off to the fairy. Laetitia would have to string her pacifiers up and choose a sacred tree which she would hang the pacifiers on the tree. Then when no one is looking, the Pacifier Fairy would come and retrieve them, but she would not leave Laetitia empty-handed. In the place of her old pacifiers, the fairy would hang a surprise present for her good work done.

I repeated the story for time to time for the next 6 months and finally it was Laetitia's birthday. Instead of hating to part with her pacifiers, she was motivated to 'donate' them away.

We followed through the ritual according to the story and had the pacifiers stringed up and hung over a tree chosen specially by Laetitia, herself.

That night, Laetitia collapsed into her bed after a evening of partying, I took the opportunity to 'play' fairy. I drew her a card and wrote her a "Thank you" message and then placed the card and a charm beside her bed.

The next morning, Laetitia woke up and saw the card, as she has not learn to read, I read the card out aloud to her. I told her the fairy had came to visit her last night after collecting her pacifiers, and the fairy had left this "bling bling" present and a card to thank her for the pacifiers. Laetitia totally bought the story and seemed very pleased with herself.

Even though the next few nights were pretty rough, Laetitia was tossing and struggling to sleep without sucking something in her mouth, she didn't ask to have Leonitus's pacifier, and not even once did she mentioned she wanted her pacifier back.

Perhaps, we would meet the Pacifier Fairy again in another two years, that's if Leonitus still has his pacifiers before his 3rd birthday.

So how did you lose your child's favorite little sucky?

What type of babies do you have?

2010-12-08T23:45:00.010+08:00

If you had read the book The Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg, you would be familiar with the term:
'Angel', 'Textbook', 'Touchy', 'Spirited' and 'Grumpy'; 5 types of babies personalities that can be observed from the first few weeks of their birth.

Laetitia is quite clearly a 'Spirited Baby'; she is loud and dramatic and is not afraid to let you know her thoughts and feelings. Her persistence is rock solid, when she made up her mind, it will take a troop of a thousand soldiers to shift her. She is easily distracted and notice everything that goes on around her. Regularity and routine with her meals and sleeping habits are necessary to provide her with some certainty that calms and soothe her. Her high energy can be easily mistaken for some hyperactivity disorder.

When she is happy, she laughs and she laughs LOUDLY. When she is sad, she cries and she howls,; it can be such a pitiful sight. When she is angry, she screams, she shouts and she might rolls on the ground - in public too!

She has a personality that draws people to notice her and in case no one notice her, you can trust her to come up with something that will certain attracts your attention.

Sometimes she makes us laugh, sometimes she makes us cry, sometimes she makes me so mad, I wanted to strangle her. She never fail to push our buttons or drive us up the wall.

In short, Laetitia IS a handful! But that, and everything that makes her who she is, are what we love about her!

On the other hand, Leonitus is a hybrid; he is 40% 'Angel' and a 60% 'Textbook' Baby. When compared to Laetitia, Leonitus comes across as a gift from above. He sleeps through the night at 4th month, rarely cries the type of cries that leave us baffled. He is predictable and takes to routine very well. He feeds well, eats well, sleep well, like clockwork.

He likes to be carried but is fine if he has to play by himself, however he would be chewing off the corners of a furniture or pages off a magazine if left unattended for more than a minute.

He is cheery and smiles at almost anybody who plays with him. When I "loan" him to my friends or colleague, he is usually calm and seems at ease even when the faces around him are unfamilar.

Everyone tells me he is the epitome of a perfect baby for a first-timer new mom. But I beg to differ. I am grateful for the fact that I had the little spit-fire, Laetitia, before Leonitus because if I had it the other way round, I probably hates everything about my 'Spirited Baby', and not learnt to appreciate both my children for who they are, regardless of their temperaments or predispositions.

If you are wishing for a baby to be like Leonitus, who seems like such a doll and doesn't cry much. You are going to be so disapoointed. Even being the easier baby among the two, Leonitus does has his moods too. He shows his displeasure and give us his fair share of terrorizing too!

Parting words:

Never say to your children "Can't you be more like your sibling." because THEY NOT THE SAME & CAN NEVER BE! Loving and accepting them for who they truly are, is the fastest way to help your children build high self-esteem and to grow up as resilient teens that could make you proud somedays.

Find out your baby's type with this webpage.

Worst Customer Service Encounter Ever!

2010-12-03T20:00:00.002+08:00

I am so fucking pissed off with the Customer Service Department of Novena Square, Velocity! This had to be my worst customer service encounter ever! Utterly disgusting!

Since everyone loves a story on customer service from hell and I needed to get this thing off my chest before I suffer a stroke, here is my story:

On 23rd Nov, I spent over $120 at Novena Square and was told I can redeem for a free ice-skating session for my child. Wow! I imagined Laetitia happily wobbling on her skates and I just couldn't wait to make this a reality for her. I went to the Customer Service Counter for the redemption of the free pass. There was a queue, so I waited patiently and then it was finally my turn, the person behind the counter handed me a card and said to me coldly, "Book it online." when I tried to ask more information.

I had thought that the poor girl might be having a lousy day to be so unfriendly and being I.T. savvy, it shouldn't kill me to book it online on my own. So I went back home, log on to the mall's website and tried.. Didn't work.. I tried again.. No, still not working and I tried so many times over the next few days, it just refused to work!

Knowing that the pass had only a 7-day validity, I had intended to book for the session on the 28th Nov, Sunday. However there was problem with their system which seemed incompatible with my browser and as a result I had to miss my chance of booking for that Sunday I wanted, despite my countless attempts.

Even when I had I emailed the customer service over that weekend, I waited the next 3 days for a reply in vain. Nobody seemed to be bothered to reply my email, let alone solve my booking woes!

On 30th Nov, understanding that my pass would be expiring, I had to make an effort to go to Novena Square's Customer Service Counter again, despite my busy schedule hoping to get some help. Not surprisingly, there was a queue and I was made to wait while the CSO even skipped my turn to issue a SISTIC ticket. I was feeling fine because I thought I would be taking some time so it was alright to let her issue that ticket before attending to me.

However the CSO was a total incompetence; she couldn't offer any solution at all. She kept stressing that my pass was valid only until that very day. I tried to repeat to her about how I was unable to book online for the past one week and MY BLOODY GOD, her skull was just so fucking thick that she couldn't get anything to pass through that! All she did was to ask me for my name and contact numbers to escalate my request after making me stood there like a fool repeating myself to insanity.

As a shopper, I felt it was only fair that the management look into my request to extend the expiry of my pass to meet my next alternative date (which incidentally had to be 12th Dec, since we will be celebrating Laetitia's birthday this Sunday and would never have make it in time, plus Mon to Sat were just no good either). Considering that I already had to miss the original date I wanted due to some technical issue with their online booking which was beyond my control, they should be accommodating with my request. Or so I thought.

But guess what?!

They replied that they can only extend the pass until this Sun even though they admitted their system, which fucking screwed up my privilege to have it on the date I wanted, had some issues. If you are a working mom of two, you would understand that I do not have the luxury to go and do something at the spur of the moment. I need to make arrangement in advance, so by telling me they are already being "so kind" to make that exception, but set such unreasonable criteria was totally unhelpful! And if they can manually extend it, why not do it at my request, instead of trying to inconvenient me in some ways or another.

I wrote back, rejected their apology because they just didn't seem sincere and had they genuinely wanting to help me, they wouldn't be putting me in a tight spot. I reasoned for the chance to be given the date I wanted but was turned downed flatly.

I had tried requesting, then pleading and finally threatening to air my grievances publicly or via any digital media I can get my hands on; they were just adamant to make me a very unsatisfied customer!

It is obvious that the management of Novena Square, Velocity DOES NOT value or respect its shoppers, for it to go to such an extent as to disappoint me times and again over such a simple act of customer service recovery.

It is imperative to any businesses that customer service is ALWAYS a top priority. As the old saying "If you don’t take care of your customer, somebody else will."

The management of Novena Square, Velocity took great length to provide me with the worst kind of customer service I had experienced till date; I believe the public should be informed of the kind of miseries they are capable of inflicting on their shoppers.

They knew that I had no qualms telling others about my horrible experience, but that didn't stop them from making THE choice to infuriate the shoppers who had spent their money in their premises, when they should be delighting.

It makes me wonder if I am doing them back a favour, giving them the extra publicity by blogging about it. Well, you might never know, to some despicable rats, bad publicity is still somehow a publicity.

I will be making one of my X'mas wish for someone to wake the management of Novena Square, Velocity up of their fucking idea so that they will start taking care of their shoppers instead of pissing the shoppers off the mall.

By the way, I kept a record of the email correspondence I had with the hellish Customer Service Department of the century here.

The ENT Infection (Part 2)

2010-11-26T23:40:00.004+08:00

After being plagued by a terrible sore throat after a sinus infection which comes and goes for the last 3 weeks, I had finally decided to visit an ENT Specialist to find out what exactly is wrong with me or in this case my throat.

The doctor used a flexible fiber optic scope to examine my throat by passing it through my nose. Eeeekk!!! When he told me what he was about to do, my soul jumped out of my body and bolted out of the door; Doc sensed that I was about to shit my pants, he assured me that the procedure would not hurt and went on to numb my nose with a spray.

Although the scope looked menacing and I was terribly intimidated by it, the procedure was only slightly uncomfortable but still very much bearable.

Here is the picture of my larynx, with inflamed arytenoids and there were little nodules found on it. Doc thinks that I have been abusing my vocal chord and he suggested that I talk less and talk softer.

But how am I going to ever do that when I am a trainer by profession and a mother to two ever challenging young children?!?!

The Gen X

2010-11-20T23:02:00.008+08:00

Generation X or simply Gen X, refer to the generation born between 1961 to 1979. Yes, that's my generation.

Singaporean born in this Gen X era typically have no maids when we were growing up, do not attend childcare but were cared for by our grandparents, relatives or babysitting neighbours, if our moms had to work. Those were the days, when families with dual-incomes were no looking to upgrade themselves to a condo or to switch to a more luxurious car but it was out of pure necessity.

Our parents from the Baby Boomer time never failed to imprint on us with their scarcity mindset. It was always save, save, save; toys = can see, cannot buy. If can buy, must wait until birthday or Christmas. And eating out in a restaurant got to do with some very big occasion, like a wedding or some festivities.

Most Gen X children grew up in a household which had both parents who might bickered or fought at times but divorce was out of the question because it was still very much a taboo. And often kids in custody of a divorced parent might not get to see the other parent as often as they like. For me, I only saw my dad like once or twice a year and my mom slightly more often at once every fortnight when I was growing up with my grandparent, after my parents were divorced.

Gen X children grow up as teenagers who hang out at tea dances, malls or arcade centres in clique and people would see us as "Ah Lian & Ah Beng". If one joined a street gang or we used to call it 'secret society', he/she would be known as playing a number, and the numbers would be 08, 18, 21, 24 or 369.

We hated to stay at home because home was just way too bored, except for MTV! There was no cable TV then and PC, or Personal Computer was a rare box with a little black screen and green words when you typed away on it; internet was totally unheard of. The cool gadgets to carry with you then was ... no not mobile phone, it was not affordable to most people then. A gameboy, Walkman and later a pager were the must-have in those days.

The Gen X teens, were rebellious and had the worst sense of fashion! We had boy's hair that was styled with a floppy centre parting and girl's hair that were dyed with the weirdest color at random spot. Makeup was a mess of bold and bright colors!

We liked to be in a 'relationship', we called it "going steady" and we had boyfriends/girlfriends referred to as "stead".

When our friends 'jio' us out and for some reasons we weren't able to make it, then we would be labelled as 'buay steady'.

There was a study that revealed us as a generation of teenagers who had premarital sex in secrecy, who did not believe in God as much as our parents and who don't respect our elderly.

Guess what kind of parents Gen X would turned out to be.

So are we the parents who are only capable of producing the delinquent teenagers that go around slashing other teenagers? Most probably, if the Gen X had their children in their late teens or early 20s they could well be the parents of these troublemaker *Gen Z.

*Will write about children of the Gen X parents later.

Cinderella - rated NC16

2010-11-11T17:07:00.003+08:00

Laetitia used to hate Chinese language; she would cover her head with her blanket when I tried to read her a Chinese story book during bedtime. But with the new school and my mom coming over more often and speaking to her in Mandarin, I can see that Laetitia is slowly learning to like the language.

In an effort to encourage Laetitia to learn Chinese in a more fun way, I decided to buy some Chinese story books on a few of her favourite fairy tale titles and one of them was "Cinderella".

So one night, we got ourselves ready in bed for the usual bedtime reading. It was the first time I was to read this Chinese "Cinderella" to her.

The beginning of the story was pretty much the usual; evil stepmother and stepsisters doing the nasty and how Cinderella got to the ball. Then I reached the part of the story on the Prince, who was searching for his bride-to-be, was passing the glass slipper around hoping to marry the one whose foot fitted it.

That was when I gasped. And I was sure my pupils must have been dilated while I read out the gruesome tale. I was in for a rude shock.

It was all blood and gory! The stepmother passed her elder daughter a knife and ask her to hack off her toe when she couldn't squeeze her foot into the slipper! Yes! You hear me right! And that stupid bimbo actually did what she was told, she had her toe cut off! Anyway, her plan was thwart by this bird which told the prince about her bloody toe.

Then came the younger stepsister, whose toe was small enough to fit the front of the slipper but her heel got in the way. And as you might have guess it, she too, used the knife to shave off the back of her heel!! OUCH!!!

So much for happily ever after huh!!?? It was more like a scary graveyard tales than one I would have expected for a story meant to be read to children.

Fortunately, Laetitia's Chinese sucks so much, she doesn't understand anything from this chink version of Cinderella, which in my opinion should be rated NC16.

The ENT Infection

2010-11-08T22:25:00.006+08:00

This was how I look a couple of weeks back. Healthy, pretty and feeling fantastic.

Last Friday, I developed a fucking nasty sore throat. Pardon my vulgarity, but there is no other better adjective I would rather use to describe how much pain I am in right now, all thanks to my damn throat!

My throat hurts so freaking bad that I cringe every time I swallow, to the extent that I would gather all my saliva in my mouth until I absolutely have to swallow or risk drooling, then I take it all in with one big gulp.

To make matter worst, my ears are blocked and a pain in my head, between my brows soon followed. This morning I woke up to a strange feeling of my eye sockets and a look in the mirror, I really hope I was dreaming it. My nose bridge, between my eyes had swell up and became very tender.

For the picture below, I drew a white line on the middle of my nose bridge so as to illustrate the puffiness around my right eye socket and my nose.

The area swell so badly that my nose seems rather crooked now and there is even a presence of what feels like a worrisome bump on the bridge of my nose.

A colleague of mine had thought I re-do my nose filler; if this is the result of my $500 worth of hyaluronic acid jab, I would have slaughtered my doctor already!

Now I look like a Neytiri of Avatar wannabe.... NOT!

I am, but a fucking frustrated person who had seen 2 doctors, spent more than $150 on medical bills and sucked more than a dozen lozenges in 3 days and still couldn't get rid of the pain in my throat nor the swell on my nose!!

Please make the pain and swell go away when I wake up tomorrow.

PLEASE!!!

The Family Trip - Down Under

2010-11-04T23:00:00.019+08:00

I went on a 8D/6N self-drive trip to Melbourne with Laetitia and Mr Hubby, while Leonitus who is too young to travel with us, stayed with home with our helper and my mom.

We flew at night and reached Melbourne's airport on the morning of the second day. After checking into Swanston Grand Mercure, we collapsed and slept for 3 hours straight before going out for a bite and a walk around the city.

We drove to Philip Island on the third day and visited the Koala Conservation Centre. We spotted some koalas but they were all sleeping; they sleep like 20 hours a day. What lazy bones!

There was a koala on the tree behind us. Try spotting it.

Then we went to The Nobbies, which offer a spectacular sea view from the boardwalk. But unfortunately, all the seals seem MIA, we didn't manage to catch any sight of them.

It was so windy and cold, Laetitia kept shouting, "Wind, stop blowing! STOP!"

Later that evening, we went to the Penguin Parade, where we watched cute lots of cute little penguins emerged from the water and made their way back to their homes. But we weren't allow to take pictures for the fear of scaring the timid creatures.

We then spent the night at The Waves Apartment which I absolutely love because it was one of the most spacious accommodation throughout our stay. Next day, we visited this mini science centre place called Amaze N' Thing and Churchill Island Heritage Farm, which I feel was way over-rated.

The only thing I found attractive on Churchill Island was the sea of lavenders.

We bid Philip Island goodbye and drove to Mornington Peninsula and stayed a night at a motel.

The morning of our fourth day in Australia, we had our breakfast at The Rocks, a restaurant facing a beautiful pier.

I love my bacon and eggs on toast. It was unbelievably yummy!

After our lovely breakfast, we drove to Moonlit Sanctuary where we saw many Australian animals and we also got to feed and pat the wallabies.

After leaving the wild life conservation park, we drove to Ashcombe Maze and Lavender Garden which is like a botanic garden with some very large hedge mazes for us to get ourselves lost.

After our lunch at the garden, we made a stop at Cape Shanck Lighthouse before catching the Sorrento-Queenscliff ferry to make our way to Geelong. Oh, btw, we spotted some dolphins which swarm close to our ferry.

After 45-min of ferry and another hour drive, we reached our hotel at Geelong. We headed out to Geelong Waterfront and had the most sumptuous dinner at LeParisien Restaurant. I think it was the most expensive meal throughout this trip, costing around AUD$250!

On our fifth day, we drove along the Great Ocean Road. The view was truly breath-taking. We drove from Torquay to somewhere close to Lorne and we decided to do a U-turn because we had to proceed to our next destination - Ballarat, our farm-stay.

The farm-stay was an enjoyable experience for all of us. We got to have a taste of living in the suburban and being a 'farmer' for a day. And our host, Peter and Glenn were the most wonderful people, they made us felt really at home.

After spending a night at the farmstead, we had to leave and drive ourselves to the city again. We stay at a hotel near Yarra River for our last night in Melbourne and we visited the Melbourne Zoo before catching our flight back to Singapore in the late afternoon.

Overall, the trip was tiring because we practically were on the move, staying at different hotel in different city every night but seeing the smiles on Laetitia's face was just too priceless. I hope to bring Leonitus along in the next couple of years and then we would be travelling together as ONE family.

In love with 'Twilight'

2010-11-01T23:02:00.001+08:00

Ya, I was actually slamming 'Twilight' in one of my previous blog entry but that was only because I hadn't watch it.

I caught all 3 series in one go on board my recent SQ flight to and from Melbourne. All thanks to Krisworld.

Now I am a total convent, loving all 3 - Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse; dying to watch 'Breaking Dawn', screening next year.

It's so wonderful to be young (18 yo +/-) and having two gorgeous guys going crazy over you at the same time. Oh God! I miss that feeling. Hahahahaha....!!

Go Edward Cullen!! You rock!!

Makeup Does Wonders!

2010-10-19T23:04:00.003+08:00

Ugly duckling can turn into a swan, all it needs is to learn to put on makeups!

16 years in the beauty industry, I think my greatest achievement is being able to transform myself with various technique of makeup application. Retrospectively, I am very grateful to Prescriptives, my ex-company, who had sent me to countless back-breaking assignments, doing runway makeups for fashion shows. I used to KPKB doing makeovers after makeovers and more makeovers all for FREE; but I am glad coz that was where I got my skill polished up.

To prove my point, I have decided to remove half side of my makeup at the end of the day for the sake of comparison. Purely makeup. Nothing fake and absolutely untouched by Photoshop.

Eyes are the most challenging area in doing makeup, however the result can be the most satisfying.

It is still me, but looking so much better with the makeups.

Even though makeup does wonders and I confident to face the world with my naked face because apart from makeup, I have good skin for my age (I am 4 months short of becoming 35!). And for that I thank SK-II!

Rock On!!

2010-10-03T22:44:00.008+08:00

When I knew that the theme for this year's D&D was "Rock Star", I was so over the moon! That was definitely a theme created specially for me because, YEAH!! I AM A ROCKER!!

When young girls were listening to stuff like Debbie Gibson, Bananarama, NKOTB, I was growing up with Metallica, GNR, Skid Row, Iron Maiden, Nirvana and many more. Yes, I might be 34 now, but I still rocks!

Check out my outfit for the night. I am proud to say every piece of them belongs to me, all I did was to put them together for that rocker chic image. A little too 'Avril Lavigne' for me, but anyhow I am not her fan.

I was down to the detail of my nails. It's a coat of black nail polish that "cracks" to reveal a red undercoat. Cool right!?
These are my rocking co-workers and my boss (extreme right). All looking very different from our daily office wear.

These are some of the girls whom I trained. This bunch really sporting; came all dressed up to the theme. They were my pride that night! You girls rock!

The 6 finalists for our BEST DRESS Contest, all different genre of rockers. We had (from left to right) The Punk Rock, The 80's Rock, The Tina Turner Rock, The Harajuku Rock, The Death Rock & The Country Rock.

It was a really fantastic night, I had a lot of fun. When the dinner finally ended, I was a bit reluctant to remove my temporary tattoo. I was even quite tempted to ink something similar. I must be out of my mind.

Anyway, I have 2 rocker babies at home, maybe one of them might just ink themselves when they grow up.

This was Laetitia at 11 mths old.

And then I have Leonitus, also a rocker, at 8 mths old.

ROCKERS RULE!! YEAH!!

Laetitia says the darndest things

2010-10-01T22:34:00.006+08:00

A few days back, I had a lot of problems with Laetitia behaving badly, to the extent that it was causing me to be so exasperated with her that I was losing my cool too often. It was hurting to hear her mean words, like "I don't like you" or "I don't love Mommy."

So one night, I decided to speak to her about the issue before bed. "Laetitia, Mommy is very upset, you know." I said quite calmly. Laetitia looked up at me and said, "Mommy upset?... Because your cousin passed away?"

I was stunned, I didn't expect that reply. "Erm... yes... I am sad about that too but no, I am more upset when you don't behaving yourself."

I told her about how hurt I was when she said that she don't love me, especially when I had sacrificed so much for her and her baby brother. Then I got more emotional and tears started to flow.

Laetitia was speechless for a while and just stared at me. Then suddenly, she asked, "You want a tissue? I get you a tissue ok?"

I thought that was rather sweet, so I nodded my head and she dashed out of my room.

Then I heard her said excitedly at the top of her voice, "Kaka, Kaka, my Mommy cried. She is sad because her cousin passed away." Following that she went to Mr Hubby and told him, "Daddy, Mommy is sad you know. Mommy cried. You say sorry to her ok. I give her tissue."

At this point, I really don't know if I should laugh or cry. Laetitia, Laetitia, how am I going to do without you!

I am praying hard that the terrible two will be amazingly transformed into terrific three in another 2 month's time.

Goodbye, Cousin!

2010-09-25T22:12:00.006+08:00

After battling breast cancer for close to 2 years, my cousin, Kim, passed on at the age of 37, leaving behind a husband who loves her dearly and 3 very young sons.

I was Mandai Crematorium, saying my last goodbye, this morning. It was utterly heartbreaking to see Kim's second son, who was only 5 yrs old asking his father where mommy was going, just before the casket entered the cremation chamber. I felt so sorry for Kim's 3 boys, to have lost their mother at such young age. I felt so helpless, not knowing what I could do to make any of them feel better.

As a parent, myself, I knew how much Kim had hated to leave this world, to let her sons grow up without a mother. Death, itself, can never be as frightening as not knowing how it can affect your children and their lives thereafter.

****************************************

Kim, or Ah Leng Jiejie (as how I had always call you), I wish we had the opportunity to bring our kids together and let them play, then perhaps I would know them better and be a better aunt for them, than the one, I am today. I am sorry. But I will try to meet up with your boys and get to know them in the future.

I am not a believer of any religion, nor do I believe in heaven or life after death, but I really hope you will be free from sufferings and be happy wherever you may be.

So long, Cousin. It's has been good being your relative all this time.

Being the "Maria" for a day

2010-09-11T22:31:00.006+08:00

I had the most tiring day on the Hari Raya Puasa public holiday. My helper was given a day off, so I had to wake myself up at 8am on a non-working day (I usually sleep in until 10am or sometimes 11am).

My helper went off at 9ish and soon after Mr Hubby also left to attend his business. Here I was alone, with the two little ones at home. My "survivor game" began.

I got Leonitus to take his late morning nap while setting Laetitia up with some colorings to do, I cooked Leonitus's lunch. Leonitus was up shortly after; I fed him and kept Laetitia company while she played her toys near us. After his lunch, I bath and changed him, and then quickly dialed for Pizza Hut to order lunch for Laetitia and myself because it would be suicidal if I attempt to cook ours.

Lunch arrived. Stuff myself with mouthful of food, fed Laetitia at the same time and threw breadcrumbs into Leonitus's mouth from time to time when he made noise.

Lunch done. Showered and changed Laetitia; gave her a book to read and put Leonitus away safely on the exersaucer while I rushed into the bathroom, threw some water onto my face and body, jumped out of the tub, rubbed dry and prayed that my 2 minute shower was good enough to keep me smelling fresher than before.

Made milk for Leonitus, fed him and read a story to Laetitia at the same time. Managed to get both of them to take their naps together.

I cleaned and washed up the dinning area. Tried to read a newspaper, but fell asleep after the 5th page or so.

Leonitus stirred. I woke up. Feeling very happy because they had managed to sleep for 2 and a half hours, then my joy was cut short when I realised Laetitia had wet her mattress!

Cleaned and changed her up, then took a long time to clean up the soiled mattress while letting the television do the babysitting of the kids for a while.

Thought I could sit down and joined them for some telly, Leonitus threw up. I changed him and washed the stain off his top before dumping all the kids' clothing into the washer.

Mr Hubby came home and brought Laetitia out to buy dinner. I hung the laundry up while keeping Leonitus entertained with some silly songs that I made up.

Dinner time. Shared a porridge with Laetitia. Cleaned up the dinning area. Smelt something crappy. Leonitus's poo was over-flowing out of his diaper onto his clothes and the seat of his exersaucer! What luck!

Showered Leonitus and changed him before scrubbing the stench off his exersaucer.

Laetitia was getting impatient to wait for her turn to shower, she was starting to make some fuss about her toys. She was catching me at the wrong moment, I was exhausted and disgruntled. "Mommy is not your slave!" I shot at her, she shut up immediately. She is smart.

Finally, our helper came home and save the rest of my day! My hair needed a wash really badly!

***********************

Verdict:

I had on me pee, poo and puke and all the time, I kept wishing I could grow another pair of arms but I am glad that I had the chance to go through a day without helper and spouse.

I would recommend everyone, anyone, who uses a maid to try this, at least for once, because it will really helps you to understand why your house is never as neat and clean as you wanted. You would become more forgiving to your helper.

And husbands, with homemaking wives, you really should do this, for you would never understand why your wife's face is always so black when you thought you are the one at a hard day's work, bringing home the bacon.