Being a SAHM

I had always wish to be a Stay At Home Mom (aka SAHM). How can I not? I love Laetitia to death, I wanted to bring up my own kids, be a housewife, cook dinner for the family. And I always thought I would be very competent because I can cook a decent meal, clean up the house better than some maids and I pretty much enjoy doing everything for my child. Moreover I am very independent.

Then Laetitia broke her arm last Thursday, so I took leave to stay at home to look after her. And boy, these few days alone changes the way I think. I begin to doubt my own ability. Have I been thinking too highly about myself, as a mom??

Having a broken arm, Laetitia has become slightly more difficult and whines doubly more than usual. And I am not feeling my best either, being close to my third trimester, my tummy is bigger and I am clumsier than ever, plus I had not been feeling well for the last 2 weeks ago. On top of all that physical aliments, Mr Hubby is away on business trip for the entire week. I am left alone to fend for myself, luckily I have a good helper. So I do not need to lift a finger on the housework, nor to cook.

To be honest, if I don't have my domestic helper, I seriously do not know how to make it through this week. Imagine, being unwell, having to do all the household chores, cook, look after Laetitia, it would be some gruelling 24/7 shit to get through by myself. I think I would end up dead.

When you have too much on your plate, it hard to be a good parent. And I want to be a good parent, not someone who gets resentful and ended up "kao peh kao bu" at her kid all day long, or worst, smack the child, which I am totally against.

This week had been an eye-opener for me. The reality checker forced my eyes opened and made me realised that I would be a better parent when I am a working mom who devotes my annual leaves and off days, playing my share of the role of the full-time mommy, minus all the houseworks. Hahaha...

Plus I do like what I do at work. So SAHM, maybe later.


Laetitia and my helper, on an afternoon where we went out for lunch and she broke a bowl in the restaurant. Haiz... It quite the norm and we are used to her "surprises" by now.

*****************************

That day I was watching Rachael Ray and there was a story about a single-dad whose wife passed away suddenly (some 27 hours after giving birth to their beautiful little bundle of joy). This dad blog about his daily struggle and how he manage to overcome obstacles to bring up his daughter, despite being a lonesome parent. I totally salute this dad!